It's Not Much

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(Edited)

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Dangnabbit, so near and yet so far!

I tapped a key grumpily to power up another ten hives. I had been powering up all manner of large and small amounts lately to try and get to the fabled 100K Hive Power.

So near to what darling?

The Good Lady was wandering around the lounge with a ball of wool in her hands, strands of it appeared to be wrapped around many of her fingers as if she were impersonating a marmoset's vagina with her hands.

My Hive power, I have ninety-nine thousand! I am only a thousand away from the big one. The big one hundred thousand Hive Power. To be perfectly honest, I never thought I would reach it.

I held my hands out to the side and made a goldfish-popping noise with my mouth as if I had been awoken from a coma by someone singing that mental Swedish Eurovision-winning song at me.

Ninety-nine thousand Hive Power...

The Good Lady said slowly, as if fearing she was being tricked.

And what is that again?

She paused, mid-finger-weave and tilted her head to the side questioningly.

Och, come on. Hive Power, It's what you get on Hive when you stake your Hive.

I grinned. Who didn't like a little staking?

Staking? What, like a vampire? Woooo, come here Hive, I'm a gonna stake you!!

She theatrically mimed plunging something sharp and woody into a ne-er-do-well vampire's chest. Or at least she tried. Her fingers were festooned with wool so instead it looked like she was panning for gold in a chest-height river.

I looked up and prayed to the old gods for the patience to explain this for the seventy millionth time.

No no no. Staking, it's when you power up your Hive. You get Hive Power which gives you bigger votes 'n shit. Like if I had a thousand Hive which is magic internet money I could power it up and I would have a bigger vote and earn interest on it and stuff.

Even as I was saying it I was cringing because it sounded fucking nuts.

Why not just spend it?

She made a tentative poking motion with one of her fingers to the nest of wool tangled in her other hand. It was like watching a Nature documentary of shy woodland creatures getting it on.

You can just spend it but it's better if you power it up and you get to dish out bigger votes and earn interest on it.

I nodded, hoping it might be infectious and she might start too.

Sounds bloody stupid. I would just spend it.

She made a proud-sounding little chuffing noise as she managed to lasso another finger with a loop of wool.

Well, I am going for the big one hundred so it's power-up central for me!

I started humming the A-Team tune because why the hell not? I had a plan, didn't I? And it was coming together, wasn't it? Hell yeah!

So hang on. You have nearly a hundred thousand Hive Power. Which is basically Hive? So you can get it back from Hive Power can't you?

The Good Lady sat cross-legged, something she could happily do now some years after her last childbirth without all her giblets falling out.

Yeah baby! When you take it out its called a Power Dooooooowwwn.

I smirked, I think she was getting it. We were Hive bros. She was my homey in the Hiving.

How much is Hive worth these days?

She looked down at her mad hand weaving and wriggled her fingers at one another till she caught another woolly loop.

Ha! Well, it's worth...

I froze, my mouth flapping open like Chris Rock's jaw after the slap.

I looked at the Good Lady as time seemed to slow. Hive was worth about 37 cents. I didn't even have to think. I always know the price of Hive. But she didn't know the price of Hive. In fact, I had an awful feeling if she did know the price of Hive then I wouldn't have any Hive in my wallet.

It would all be spunked up the muck of the local travel company or in buying shit for the house. I would have no Hive Power and she wouldn't give two hoots.

It's not often I lie to the Good Lady, except for those times I stagger home smelling of another lady's cloven hoof or with feathers in my hair and a wallet bulging with soiled fives.

But necessity is the mother of lying like fuck or something like that.

It's only worth a few cents. Quite low. Holding on to it in case it ever moons, you know?

I smiled winningly as if we were lovers that had decided to have children and stop being lovers.

Oh, so that would mean it's all worth a few thousand then? Ah, that's not much. May as well leave it.

She got up with the woollen madness in her hands and bumbled off into another room to mess with someone else's head.

Yeah, it's not much.

I whispered.

Not much at all...



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163 comments
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Congrats mate! It is a great achievement on HIVE, and I am about to reach 2000 HP :)

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It's all about hitting those targets!!! You must be ahead of your predictions!

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I'd get more excited about 99,999.999, see if you can get that, even just for a split second before the big one..

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That would be fun to get a screen shot of!!

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Not long now, not long at all.. 😁

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It ticks up slowly when you are watching. Like a bloody kettle!! Lol

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lol I know, I'm waiting to hit 4000!

How is the shoulder?

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The shoulder is doing great. I can move it all the way about and it's just kind of stiff but not too sore. Still taking it easy but I reckon another few days or a week and I will be able to start doing proper stuff!!

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Awesome, then nothing is torn :) Definitely time to think about using power tools in the yard though, instead of taking a chance on a repeat?

!PIZZA !ALIVE !LOL

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I'd get more excited about 99,999.999, see if you can get that, even just for a split second before the big one..

That would be fun to get a screen shot of!!

If you ever try that. I will send you a $0.001 HP transfer to your wallet through blocktrades or will delegate you $0.001 hive right away just for the laughs. And well, maybe to ruin your screenshot too! ;o)

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Haha, you won't have to part with that for many years yet.. But thank you for the kind offer.. 🤣

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Well, it's just that I am that generous, considerate and also a joker. But above all, I am a very patient chap. So, I think I'll wait as long as it takes until you or @meesterboom try to take that elusive 99,999.999 HP screenshot. };)

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😂 ok, I've put it in my calendar to nudge you "in the year 2525".. hehe

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Hahaha well, I suspect you won't have to wait that long. Because long before 2525 Mr. @meesterboom already will become into a so skilled whale in the art of lying to his wife with prolly no less than a couple of dozen millions of HP in his wallet. That with just a couple of upvotes he will grant you from time to time in your posts, you'll be as close to 100k HP as he is right now.

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I have been reading your posts since long time and sometimes I don't understand much due to your selection of deep words but still I try to finish and understand how much I can. Hive power has really great power towrads influencing the newbie here on hive. It gives them great boost and exposure.

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Thank you. We should all try to gather a bit more hive

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100K? I'm not likely to have half that yet by year's end. You keep stacking! Just don't let the Good Lady anywhere near the price feed!

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If she finds out the price, it's gone!! Thankfully she things crypto is a load of baloney!! 😀

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As long as she thinks it's only worth 30 quid, you're safe, right?

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Yeah, I am safe until something happens that mkaes my jaws flap like it going to a dollar or something! If it moons to that I am humped because I drink beer and my lips get loose when I do 😀

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Feathers in your hair and solid fivers in your pants?

Now there's an interesting story hidden in there I think. Sounds like a hippy event. But then a quite naughty one. 😄

Good luck in reaching 100K soon! 🍀

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Cheers mate!! Feathers... Could be a farmyard story although not with all the money 🤣🤣

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99,000 HP.... Congrats on 100k in advance!

Damn this is Perfect explanation of Hive Tokenomics right here!

if she did know the price of Hive then I wouldn't have any Hive in my wallet.

Haha, tell her wen hive moons and make new All time highs... gotta throw a party then.

Tho Dream Goals and milestone! Who knows, maybe one day will see this day.

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One day we should all see our give goals and a respective moon!!

That would be good. I might even buy her dinner 🤣

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Whooot, need to follow that track.....

Greetz and see you hopefully with a beer soon somewhere

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That would be nice mate! Beer makes the world go round!!

At least that's what I tell the missus!

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I thought money does

But I love that beer does too though 😅

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Money mostly but beer flows smoother!!! 🤣🤣

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As someone who loves beer...I support this! 😂😂

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That was a close shave. Glad she isn't interested enough to look up the price of Hive ;<)

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Me too, or it would be plundered. She would go full on money Viking!! 😀

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It would be a waste of effort and crappy timing.

At least Hive still has a 13 week powerdown ;<)

P.S. I am dreaming of ever making it to 100k Hive,
but I have practically been living on my Hive since I started out here ( 6 years ago )

Have a great week!

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It's great that you can live on it though! I love the fact that sooner people can live on what they earn or at least compliment their living by what they earn. It showed just how good hive is!

Haha a corking week yourself dudeski!!!

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🤣 I got a good chuckle out of this. So much goody goodness in this post. You know she's probably going to look it up right? Imagine she had seen it when it hit it's ATH?!

Congrats in advance. I look forward to seeing the celebration post.

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She will never know!! She isn't interested at all in it now. She was back in the day. If she knew what it had been worth I would be dead!!

I just saw your transfer! Aww, thank you!!

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I'm not gonna laugh I said, watch this, I'll read read read and not laugh once. I made it to the panning for gold part.

You seen Chris Rock's new one? He killed it! Mooned it, powered it up.

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I did see it. It was worth the wait to finally get his reaction. It was funny as fuck!!

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5 stars, 2 thumbs up and all that.

What about Jim Jeffries new one, seen that? A lot of them are putting out new stuff again finally. Chris Rock is still in the lead, though. But dude that new Jim right there is a helluva runner up.

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I haven't, I will have a look!! I do like that comedians are putting up stuff calling out shit that's going on

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Your writings need to make it onto screen, your creativity knows no bound - panning for gold simultaneously reenacting a scene from The Lost Boys, we do look forward to them, i've seen your... I think it was guitar related on YT.
Have you ever done a Jackanory typa thing on there, dressed as you would above on a Harley etc?

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Haha, now that would be an imaginative thing!!! I have done many things on YouTube but never anything like that!!

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I honestly think you should, revenue for entertaining people :) and exactly your familiar with it, and if your dead against either that - Annabelle could read it out on a joint set up youtube channel, shes done radio regularly speaks at events, award winning public speaker and does all our V/O work - there's something to think about :) ps we are serious

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It would be funny to think of someone else reading it out! Lol, I will think on it. It should like a great idea

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Excellent :) and we're likely not far that apart us being in the North

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(Edited)

We probably aren't but have you noticed how much of a pain it is to get between some places in Scotland and the North of England. It's nuts!

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Our second home for years was Aderbean, primarily for Oil relatedness in Dyce - perfect for MTB too, now eMTB - it's far more enjoyable heading up than down south, eek.. bar ridiculous amounts of average speed cameras - did you see our MG4 Aberdeen and Cairngorms trek 800mile ?

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I haven't seen, I will have a look!

The average speed cameras are a nightmare. Not so much for the keeping the speed down but the constant pressure of checking the Speedo and people driving at work speeds that you have to keep weaving in and out of! Horrible!

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:) i know, the A9 used to be an awesome road amongst others, V6 Galant doing lets say 70 all the way, it was like a race track, and everybody did it.

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And now it's the most boring road ever! I go up there all the time to visit the in-laws!

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eek, yes, when we came back recently in the torrential rain that was fun.

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I hate that road in the rain. The rain and the dark, brutal!

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It weirdly has a veil in treacherous weather, even with LED's - something untoward or telling non Scots never come back

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My 'good lady' is also fairly oblivious to what I get up to on Hive. I have told her what my stake is worth and then she's asked why I don't take it out. I say it has potential to be worth much more.

I'll get to 100k fairly soon. It's still a long way off whale status though.

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It's funny, I think it must be the first thing they ask why not take it out and enjoy - it's far more clever to keep some in with a little dip into now and then!

Whale status seems unreachable!

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This is you hiding your bag of gold from the good old lady because you know if you tell her, your 99k Hive might see a reduction. Which is good for now until it worth much to her as she already encouraged you to keep it then.

You are 1k away from 100k which is very impressive. I am happy for you. Congratulations on getting the 100k mark soon.... I have a feeling it is near 😉

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That was close, man! If you'd told the real price, you'd have lost half your hive. Soon you'll be 100k, wow, that's great progress! That's what I've been dreaming of. To reach this level in a few years!

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I would have lost half and more!!!

Just keep plugging away and powering up and you will be there before you know it!

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Damn, I thought you were going to make that mistake after all). I don't like lying, but in this case it's either that or defend your point of view with a gun... Not good against girls.)) lol
!LOLZ
!invest_vote

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There are some lies which have to be told!! The consequences of the truth would be too grim by far!! 😀

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That was the cost per share of Amazon in the 90's. It took over a year for the stock to hit $1.

Really good things came to those who waited.

I remember buying some, then eventually dumping it since it was basically a stagnant stock. If only I had put fresh batteries in my crystal ball.

To the moon!!!!

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These crystal balls doctrine need a right good polish do that we can see far enough into them!!

It's things like that I like to think about, the Amazon stock that is, not crystal balls!! 😀

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Lol. I got your transfer!! Thank you! You can indeed say that!! :0D

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If only I'd did the same to Jeff Bezos.... 😇

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Haha, oh yes indeed!!

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You are soooooo close!!! Today is the day!

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I know, I keep watching it tick up! I'm excited!!

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image.png

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Just as I got to this reply and checked... Weeeeee! 😀😀

Screenshot_20230527_145641_Chrome.jpg

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Congratulations!!!! It's an achievement well deserved!!!

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Thank you very much, I am very chuffed. Now I can quit... 🤣🤣

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I remember someone in your comments wanted to see 99,999. With the exchange rate ... I almost got it.

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Crikey, I missed getting that as well. I was too focused on the big 100!!

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My siblings watch BTC and think I'm rich, so I have to let them down gently and tell them its play crypto. They get that. Like monopoly money...

I never thought about outright lying... That might work better. Is the pennies answer still holding up for you? :)) Congrats on the almost there status! That is pretty awesome!

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It's holding up, she really isn't interested in the whole monetary side. Still thinks it's all a scam. I tell everyone it's play money too or magical internet money but I say it in a way that implies it's not real! If we moon next year when bitcoin does we will be laughing!!

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Exactly! I only have half of what you have and I'm giddy. Remember the pump and dump where we were rich?? Everyone has been holding a little ever since.

Magical internet money

LOL

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I remember that pump well!! It was a fine time.

50K is a splendid figure. I find that when you hit 50K it all snowballs a little and you just start romping up the ranks!

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54,300! I just looked. I have got to be pretty close to Orca by now. Soon!

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Oh you must be!! I am sure it is around the 55000 mark!! That will be exciting. Swimming around with your majestic grin and sharp little pointy teeth ready to savage all! :OD

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Yes! I must need a new dress for the event!

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Explaining Hive to people is like talking to cats.

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It's like taking to cats that are watching third rate cat porn and smoking a doob!

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Explaining Hive to people is like being put on hold.

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It's like being on hold to a cat watching third rate porn and smoking a doob! :OD

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Explaining Hive to people is like ordering takeout.

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If takeout is fried cat that you eat whilst watching feline porn and smoking a doob!!

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Explaining Hive to people is like taking a brisk morning walk and stepping in dog shit.

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A shit from a dog that has eaten a cat that was too stoned and dizzy on porn to run away fast enough!

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Explaining Hive to people is like when there's no toilet paper.

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No toilet paper so you end up grabbing your stoned, porn-lovin cat and giving your chuff a good ole wipe with him!

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Explaining Hive to people is like getting your dick stuck in the zipper.

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And you scream until you realise that your zipper is your stoned cat and you have both eaten too much pizza!

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Hahahah . Yeah my wife is the exact same. What she doesn't know won't hurt her until we are millionaires . Millionaires I tells ya. STacking GLX like a squirrel at the moment myself before the game launch. I am not missing the next Splinterlands boat. No sir eee.

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It's cheap too right now!! I live to stack things. You never know when it will pay off. I remember buying hunners of Ripple way back when it was cheap as anything and then it mooned and I sold it all!

She didn't know anything about that either 😉

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Same with me with the old Chiliz token . It was great. I was on cloud nine and I never told her. Takeaway is on me tonight . wooo.

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Yeah, they think you are awesome for buying a takeaway whilst you takeaway all the way to the bank! lol

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Didn't I warn you before not to tell her how much was in there 😲 Now if it ever does moon, and hits the news, you are officially sunk :(

In fact, I had an awful feeling if she did know the price of Hive then I wouldn't have any Hive in my wallet.

Exactly 😢 I take it she doesn't approve of investing?

This post has been manually curated by the VYB curation project

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She doesn't approve of wild West crypto!! Her brother is forever regaling get off internet scams and she seems to believe him more than me and thinks all crypto is ultimately scammy.

She will never know if it moons either! 😀😀

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She will never know if it moons either! 😀😀

But she might suspect when you start buying everything you ever wanted!

!PIZZA !ALIVE !LOL

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Which is why I will have to brick up all my ill gotten gains in a wall of the house and hope that it is never found!

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That doesn't sound like a very good use for them. You'll at least want to retire in comfort :) ...

!PIZZA !ALIVE !LOL

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I will, I will be staring at the bricked up wall in my cold house running my hands together with glee!!

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It is a large amount, I need to work much, much more to achieve it, you explain well to the good lady and she will understand what she wants to understand haaaaaa, women are very intelligent do not be fooled haaaaaa, I would say that she knows what she wants on the topic haaaaaa

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It did take a bit of grinding to get nearly there! I just need to focus on that last thousand!

And she can be happy in never knowing :O)

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Probably a good call to lie. Otherwise you wouldn't have any HP lol.

I literally had a conversation with my mom last night about Hive and making money with my blog and her last remark was "oh, I thought you were getting real money."

... it's like damn. Not going to lie, that hurt a little.

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That would sting!! Parents never get the internet money thing. My mum used to look at me as if I was talking voodoo when I mentioned it.

But yeah, if she knew I would be cleaned out!

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Yeah it's a hard concept to grasp for the older generation... and middle... and younger actually haha. I guess it's still too new for a lot of people 🤷 😕

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Hard for all!!

I remember starting and being mystified by it all and then eventually it clicking and then on thinking it was easy but it's not!

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So true. They shut down the exchange I was using and now I'm terrified to find another one. I have just not bothered to do it for like 8 months the lol 😅 🙃

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Ah the exchanges and associated things. That can be a devil as well. There are so many things which really just put crypto out of reach of the masses. ITs not just Hive, its Crypto!

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Reaching 100k Hive power is really amazing. congratulations on that, I want to ask you, have you earned all the hive you have or you have invested your money to buy and power up?

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It's all been earnings. Although I have bought hive with the hbd I have earned either through hbd interest or through selling it for another crypto and then buying back when the price is right. I haven't invested any fiat in which I am quite proud of!

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That is also the exact way I am powering up
I always power up little by little
That is what I do.

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It's the best way and before you know it you have a tidy sum of hp!

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I saw this on the news the other day...I think you might have a problem on your hands!

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Hahaha!!! I would really be in trouble!!! 🤣🤣

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Many many congratulations. I had a similar intention earlier but due to some compulsion I have to seal the HD I have because the conditions in Pakistan are bad. As soon as I get a good job I will start collecting it again. Within four months I had collected four hundred HP.

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That is good going. It helps if you are working and not needing the cash to cash out. I wish you well!

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This time you got away with it!
If she should ever think of going to look for the true value but you're fucked twice ... there won't be any valid strategy because she will have to take revenge even for the lie!

But she won't look for him, she trusts you and in any case, probably, currently she doesn't care much eh eh!
If she was really interested you wouldn't have had time to go from 99000 to 100000 ... You would have found yourself a new kitchen or something and the Hive wallet at 0 lol!

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Haha, I need never fear. She might inadvertently find out see the price of bitcoin somewhere but hive, nah!!

She just doesn't care at all. I don't blame her, it's been a number of years now. More it's just my annoying hobby 🤣🤣

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Love this one super power up 💥

I don't believe you lie to the Good Lady hardly ever at all for a minute.

Also. I'm stealing your "to the old gods" bit. 👍🏻 Or appropriating it, rather. This way we can argue about it later.

So spill the beans, old timer. What's with the 100k fable? I promise not to take it as advice or listen at all.

Great piece of writing btw :D As smooth as that mental Eurovision winning song. Or the chest of the guy who won it anyway.

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I'm almost there, just a seven hundred more or so to go!!

And I don't often lie but this time I had to, she sees no point in keeping magic internet money on the magic internet. She would have it all out in a flash. Can't have that!! The old gods would be angry!!

I would have to enter Eurovision myself for kicks or something!! 😀😀

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😂

I may call her and spill the beans just to see you at Eurovision!

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Almost, almost there! Hope my few cents are helping byou get more cents. Lol at least the good lady is paying an interest. Soon you will be loaded and buy that yatch and call it the good lady's beehive and she will be happy she didn't make you spend all that money! I'm no where near to my hive goals, but one day I hope it can make a dent in my soon to be home loan!

Well played Boomie, well played! !PIZZA

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Every cent counts! I am sure one day she will be well happy that I didn't tell her. At least she won't know if it goes the other direction!

I hope one day you can spam that home loan with your Hive stash!

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Indeed! Especially if its free internet money! She will be thinking of all the lovely ways to put it to good use!

LOL I'm a long way off, and probably won't amount to a big account like yours! I'm too inconsistent and don't have it in me to give hand jobs to all big voters! Carpul tunnel, you know!

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HAnd jobs are an absolutel necessity. Yo don't get anywhere in this world without a good handjob!

:OD

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Lol explains why I'm down at the bottom! Need to get Mrs Palmers wax out for action!

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Lol. It's worth a few pennies. Good thinking with that lie. I'm still languishing at 15K

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