Tumshie
Indian Summers are fabulous aren't they?
Enthused Florence Gump, a Mummy sort that was standing beside me as I watched my kids play on a rope swing in the local park.
If life was a big of chocolates she was the horrible cheap coffee one that everyone hates
Urr.
I replied, pulling my collar up against the howling wind that had flecks of spitty rain in it like an old asthmatic man shouting. The tail end of summer was not striking me as particularly Indian or Summer'y.
Jesu loves outdoors. Absolutely loves it, no matter the weather!
Florence Gump looked adoringly at Jesu who managed to fall over whilst standing still.
Jesu was obviously quite the wee prick.
I studied him with a calloused eye. I had never seen a child wear so much brown, orange and beige. He looked like the furious love child of an anaemic shit and a tiger.
My kids hate coming out in the rain.
I said forlornly as the wind took another swipe at me like an invisible Muhamad Ali. Even though the rain was light my children had given up swinging and were now sheltering under a big leafy branch as if beset by a biblical storm.
Really? Aw, that's such a shame. Oh hey, look how well they are getting on with Jesu!
Florence Gump pointed over at Jesu who had also now abandoned the swing and was trying to get in on the shelter under the tree but was being seriously rebuffed by the Little Lady who was, even at this distance, clearly screaming that there was no room.
The fact that there was loads of room made me feel heart swelliingly proud of her.
Do you live nearby?
Florence Gump asked, flicking her matted hand me down hair to the side.
Hmm. I thought of lying in case she followed me home like a scraggly cat wanting biscuits and ear scratching. Then I remembered I had a nobbly stick by the door for such occasions.
Yeah. Round the corner.
I waved a sultry arm in the direction of my house. Near enough to satisfy my odd urge for honesty but not specific enough for me to get the cat-stick out for her.
Ow!!! Mummy, she shoved me!
Yelled Jesu backing away from my kids who seemed to have a zero tolerance for wankers policy on their under the tree rain shelter.
Jesu pointed accusingly at the Little Boom as he scrabbled near the safety of his Mum.
Florence Gump made an eating Tom Yum soup face and turned to me.
Oh, that's unfortunate. I think your daughter wasn't very kind with little Jesu. Should you have a word with her?
I looked at Florence and marvelled at her thumbs and how much they resembled grubby big toes before shaking my head in the negative.
I think his penis makes him more my son than my daughter.
I nodded happily. That's how it is in my world and I'm quite happy with that.
What? What??
The Gumper's head backed up a step whilst her body stayed still.
His penis, you know, Jesu probably has something similar? Maybe?
I smiled majestically at her like a stag that is standing on a rock as the sun goes down.
Jesu, come. Come away.
Florence Humpergump snatched at her beige child and matched him briskly away taking loudly aboutsomething or other that should be on a leash.
I hoped she was talking about me the big tumshie that she was.
Must be a tumshie not able to tell a boy from a girl, perhaps girl from a boy...., what the hell you know what I mean.
Another tale to enjoy reading to the end!
@tipu curate
Upvoted 👌 (Mana: 35/75) Liquid rewards.
Hehe, he has long hair. It seems to instantly manure him unidentifiable to half the population. Even when they are corrected they get it wrong or refuse to hear. Tumshies all of them!! 😀😀
Days of short, back and sides long gone, look at the features, or doodah....
I blame Hollywood and all those kids with the curtains of hair back in the eighties. They messed everything up!
Actually earlier Cavemen, Romans, Egyptians, Vikings....
Snip snip, cut cut, or don't give a fuck 🙃
Started again with the Beatles in the '60s and Bob with rastafari dreadlocks.
Being a Barber might not be such a good business plan after all!
It works be quite the ongoing chase to her to worry the current trends. No wonder they all default to the same cut!
Potty haircut easiest.... "basically place a potty on your heed, and cut round it, u will then be a potty chop" 💂
Hehe, we call that a bowl cut!!
Think a few of us suffered from that when Mom's took control of scissors....
You absolute stag. Im getting a lion king vibe for some reason, on top of that rock. We singing the circle of life lol
!BEER
We shall sing it together, on the rock!!!!! The cuuuuuuuurcuuuhl!!
Hey mate, it is too early for the indian summer for us! It generally happens in the end of October or in the beginning of November. However, it has quickly become cool in September this year. I still think to go to sea!
Holy quack! The nearest we get to it is in September. Last week was nice but this week has plummeted to icy winds and rain and people are still staying how lovely it is. Lol!
No drop here for a month.
I would love that, I can't take all the rain!
I wouldn't because the water level of dams is in at critical level.
I know, it's ridiculous that in places there is none and others too much
Indian summer. How racist. And fuck that bitches kid. Quit being a wanker. (I would say pussy.. but I'm not Scottish)
I should have pulled the old racist card out. That would have been funny. Penis worked just as well though!! 🤣🤣
Penis certainly is a conversation ender. We'll most times anyway.
Except for those special happy purple monkey times!!!
must be the type of cheap caramel and orange chocolate that nobody likes ;<)
The penis sentence must have taken care of her not showing up at your doorstep in the future. Nice one!
Ah, there is a cheap caramel orange one that no one likes in chocolates too!! I could have put that in! :OD
I have the cat-stick... just in case :O)
I made that chocolate up haha!
A cat stick will do the work
although I'd prefer a cat-apult
You never can tell these days, there are some whacky flavours coming out all the time!
Lol!
Muy buena publicación!!!!
Gracias amigo!!
How surprising he couldn't tell a she from a he? This is so hilarious.
Such an interesting story.
It seems to happen a lot. The long hair confuses people!!
You don't have to share your shelter with anyone. Congratulations for teaching private property laws to your child at an early age my friend hahaha.
They guarded that shelter well!! 😀😀
I tried to find a Hodor gif but didn't XD
Haha, that would have been awesome!!
The Little Lady is great with her anti-idiotic policy.
Florence Gump is worse than her son Jesu a couple of morons 😤.
PD: pass me the mushrooms you eat must be strong 🤣.
The only mushrooms that should be eaten are the strong ones!! 😜😜
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Great with your smoked story.
No doubt the Jesu learned a lesson with that sensual honesty 🤤.
I hope lessons were learned all around!! Lol
Wondering what Native Americans called it before European settlers showed up and started calling it Indian summer, I consulted the prestigious internet. Never really found an answer, and since there were so many different Native cultures here they probably called it many different things, but did find out that the term only entered wide usage in Great Britain as recently as the 1950’s. Prior to that, it was Saint Martin's summer. And in central and eastern Europe, it’s variants of old women’s summer.
I like the sound of old women's summer - it has the feel of stuff proper historical reasoning!!
I am surprised it is so recent, I had half thought it something to do with the old empire days and people returning from India itself. The internet is good for some things!
Plz help hivepower send gays plz
I am not sure how I would fit the gays in the post?
:D gays :D
🤣🤣
he should have learned the meaning of gay before commenting :D
Lol. I am hoping it was a typo!!
I don't think so. he is asking you for some HP :P
Lol. He might be out of luck then with that message!
Thank you for your witness vote!
Have a !BEER on me!
To Opt-Out of my witness beer program just comment STOP below
View or trade
BEER.Hey @meesterboom, here is a little bit of
BEERfrom @isnochys for you. Enjoy it!Learn how to earn FREE BEER each day by staking your
BEER.I don't think so. he is asking you for some HP :P
By the way, do you know , we know each other :P
Hope this helps.
Italic
Best not to let the cat-stick get too far out of reach, you never know when whackos like her will hide out in your bushes waiting on a prime opportunity to give you a stern talking to.
I am quite sure I have them queuing up. Maybe not for a beating... I wish, lol 🤣🤣
😂 Sounds like the makings of a great weekly sitcom
Let's get filming!!! 😀😀
Greetings Mr of the sexy arm pointing towards your house lol.
Definitely the weather is terrible in your land because summer is over, but the weather is so crazy that it's raining here to sing to you every day and the sun 😎 which is very warm and loved in my land comes out scared almost all day, that if the humidity terrible 😰.
It is very stupid not to know how to distinguish gender in children🤬, that person has a special rejection of human diversity.
Those neighbors that you have are all characters just like that horrible coffee of those very cheap ones that taste like soaked cardboard ufff of ugly anda Bad taste.🤣
Hola chica!!
I think the people that can't tell if a child is male or not don't even try. The little guy hates it and gets all gnarly so I feel honour bound to defend him!!! 😀😀
I would do the same I have been working for a foundation against gender violence for years and there are many people who have a great cognitive dissonance about it.
Fortunately, there are more of us who can make a difference for the well-being of our children in the world. applause for you, my dear gentleman.💜🫂
The is a splendid occupation!! My wife does a similar role and she is very happy helping people.
Making a difference is what counts 🙂
Of course, it is to help people in a dangerous situation as much as possible.
Greetings to your wife 🫂
It's lovely and warm, down south, what ye on about?!
Is it?? Fucking hell, it's been icy cold rain today. Although apparently tomorrow the sun might make a brief appearance!
Its like 22c here, not full summer but pretty decent.
We're making 14/15 daily at the mo. Which is shite!!
Kids of a certain age range are impossible to identify. The only thing to by is hair and clothes 😆
That's the thing, he has long hair but damn, he looks like a boy! I had long hair when I was young and I swear I wasn't mistaken for a chick!
Yeah. That happens too. With some it is very obvious. Sounds like that's the case for your son.
I hope so and it's not just that I am taking umbrage to genuine mistakes and offending everyone left right and centre 😀
Lol insults for everyone!
It makes the world go round!!
"The bug tumshie that she was."
Laughs now sometimes I wonder how your daily life goes 😂 with the stories you can write up 💯😂✊🏻
Mostly my daily life is as dull as ditchwater. But occasionally there is a ripple!! 😀😀
Oh boy oh boy and we tend to live for those ripples right! My huge ripple is coming this December 😂 can't wait!
Other than that, how have you been!!
The ripples are the thing!
I have been good mate, soaked with work lately but I think it is easing. What about you?
Well that certainly is debatable, I'm swamped with work as well. We've got about 45 vehicles in the shop that needs to get out of there.
Other than that in my personal life things are clearing up a little bit, although not for long I am going to start with studies real soon again! Hoping to finish my technician levels at the end of next year!
But for now I doubt I'll be missing much on Hive as I have some free time to throw around a few comments!
Grab a slice of !PIZZA
45!? Bloody hell. That's millions!! Hehe.
It's always good to get a bit of free time to potter about the Hive byways 🙂
You know how to make friends. Well I'm assuming you do as there's little sign of it here. According to some Hive is 'anti-social media', so you must feel right at home ;)
I fully understand the need to disassociate with some folk, but some are so persistent.
Haha, I have seen such nonsense. It is funny how the ones that spout it are often the ones who act very negatively. For most the experience is a good one as we know.
Some folk are terribly persistent. They need a firm rebuttal!! 😀
Tom Yum soup face...I forgot about that. I'm going to have tom yum soup for lunch today, take a selfie of my tom yum soup face and do a tom yum soup face post about my tom yum soup face ...using the AI feature on Peakd of course...just for that extra layer of tom yum soup face originality.
I wonder if Peakd are going to introduce a Tom Yum Soup feature as part of their AI rollout? 🤣🤣
Seriously though, I am waiting for the torrent of AI driver that we are about to experience
I'm sure it's on the cards...anything is possible it seems. And yes, a torrent indeed...I'm like, WTF?
I was surprised too but I suppose its keeping up with the times although the scammers will use it as justification now, sigh
I'll still DV AI, my right to do so, just as it's their right to use it.
Oh aye, with you on that one!!
Oh dear. The people we have to put up with. I'd love you to turn the story of the check out guy I met at Aldi into a figurative language loaded entertaining rant, but perhaps I'm mad enough to give it a go myself.
My grandson is often dressed in pink merely to challenge people's expectations. Dad couldn't get over it once so they damn well make sure he is in pink every time they visit my old man, which is hilarious to all of us.
I am sure you are quite mad enough to do it yourself! Hilariously so!
My boy loves pink, that throws people too. I am like FFS, it's a colour!
It's bizarre what people choose to focus on.
Aldi man rant coming up.
They just can't escape what has been defined into them I think. I suspect that is why they are all having so much trouble moving with the times
Aldi rant posted, though I just couldn't teach your level of simile goodness. 💚💚
$PIZZA slices delivered:
@technicalside(4/5) tipped @meesterboom
https://twitter.com/lee19389/status/1703036547673600308
#hive #posh
No wonder the little girl.. er.. uh boy is so horrid, look at it's Dad !
🤣
Poor tyke, doesn't have a chance !
You have such a grand way of putting people off when you choose. I'm sure she was surprised and appalled appropriately.
You can't let just anyone invade your space.... right ??
My space is sacrosanct!! I hate it when people about me when I just want to be left in peace.
Sometimes even saying innocuous but unexpected things is enough to set folk off!
Have you ever beaten anyone with that stick?
Perhaps not but it will always be there in case a beating is needed!!
oh, you can MRS boom can also use it on you for beating purpose? :P
The stick isn't choosy!!
https://twitter.com/jewellery_all/status/1703167732735467757
https://twitter.com/LovingGirlHive/status/1703196834586661230
Parents! I've just spent an hour rescheduling the clinic diary to stop two parents bumping into each other after a recent unfortunate incident between their two kids which resulted in the tragic loss of a limb.
I'm sure there are plenty of markets in Thailand that sell cheap, plastic Tyrannasaurus Rex' ....
At 57, I sometimes wonder where the space-time continuum glitches and whose life I actually appear to be living!
Hoping the family are healthy and happy and having a marvellous weekend :-)
That's still well young. It's just that the older your get the more you understand the space-time continuum!!
Parents are the worst they really are. I always said I hated kids but what I actually hate are the parents!
You're almost correct about parents. There is one I like....perhaps a little too much lol ;-)
Let's see @meesterboom, you are the one who says that your daughter has no tolerance hahahahaha, you definitely don't like making friends while your children have fun with the other children, I understand, the truth is when I go out to shopping centers and some people sit next I get up, it seems like a spring will be executed, and I'm not lying to you, I prefer to be alone and look and look
Haha what writing style! The dialogue is funny and the story telling flows so well.
Tumshie huh? ;)
Tumshie. It's a great word.. cheers mate!!
Ha ha ha ha
Be gone Florence Gump and your dizzyingly optimistic positivity, can't you see that Sir Boom was enjoying his bit of weather misery, it's our right in these climes be God...
Aye the misery is real. I have the hating back on and everything. The curtains of winter terror are closing in!!
Oh don't mention the W word.... Brrrrrrr 🥶
I know, it's a bastard. I am jetting off to Ibiza in a fortnight though so woot woot!!