Death Kill

Call the municipality, they cut the trees here 😄

In our place, if we don't like a certain type of tree, we call a worker to come and sell it so they can cut the tree for us and earn some money.

I've done my share of tree-fellin'. I even have a saw on a pole! It's very useful. It can be a bugger getting rid of all the off-cuts though. Seems you're not allowed to just burn stuff when you like these days.

If one has never ninja jumped onto a tree welding a saw to slay the treeish beast, one has never truly lived.

Some cuts and bruises are a small price to pay for the wholesale slaughter of that wanker tree and anyway, pain goes away, chicks dig scars and glory last forever.

Death to all trees that block out the few minutes that the sun actually shines in Scotlandia.

I didn't realize that the story of cutting trees is so beautiful, your writing presents the matter beautifully

very precisely and nicely present a message to society via a Tree Cutting story. Trees are more important for us to protect our environment.

Scotland Chain Saw Massacre

The kids will forgive you one day lol.

Oh the horror!....incoming yarn price increases?!? Say it ain't so!

as I tromped out of the garage bearing an oversized pole with a saw on the end of it.

For a moment I thought you had (re)watched The Evil Dead the night before.

The Predator part made me smile too :<)

Trees are very important in the society so we should leave them and let them grow. I have a question. There’s a friend here on Hive who recently cut the tree at the front of his house and the reason was that he didn’t want the tree to fall on his car.
That makes sense
Right?

Don't blame luck, you're in control said the tree. it's a good thing you didn't get physically hit by the branches, but a little tired of the stress of pruning the branches that hide our friend the sun.

Congratulations yeayyy for your Lady that now if she gets a better tan and the smallest flora in the garden will also benefit ☀️

Get a silky pole saw, Japanese design and made. No tree has a chance if you come at it with one of these. Way better than a chain saw.

🤩 !PGM

"Secret cigars" ... sounds like a blunt to me.

And btw.. there goes your Arbor Day gift. Murderer.

Lady. I do not pay someone to come in and wipe my arse so I am not going to pay some random man to come in and murder a fucking tree for me.

Too right dude, I also have one of these menacing devices for those lanky trees. I didn't get the the cheap arse one and am glad of it. The saw is a little bendy and it takes some fucking effort to use these monsters at high level.

You need to start taking before and after pictures of such events.

I have a dead tree on our property that needs to come down. I could use a guy with a pole saw and some felling experience. Too bad you're thousands of kms away

LOL, making the mundane incredibly interesting as always. Love this! And very relatable, we had two enormous trees in our backyard growing up, a silver leaf oak tree and a giant eucalyptus which was one if not the tallest in the neighborhood complete with a tree house, which after time, you only went up there if you didn't value your life. Regardless, my fearless father kept trying to prune both of those well into his 70's haha. Then they sneakily just waited until I flew home for a visit before tasking me with doing it. Good times.

We have 2 trees that grew way larger than they were supposed to, with heavy branches overhanging the roof. A friend recommended 2 guys who were not registered tree surgeons, so I was a tad nervous, but trusted my friend. I watched a little and saw they had the technique right to prevent the branches from crashing through the roof, but I walked away, too nerve-wracking for me!
I'm sure I was also wringing my hands like your Good Lady!
Here in our subtropical climate, I'm sure even a broomstick would grow into a giant if shoved into the ground;)
Tree-felling certainly looks like no fun, you're a brave man tackling this alone!

Sounds like you are going to have an interesting visit from the neighbors soon? Did you get the trunk too?

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I also remember a similar story, when we were 17 years old, we also used to ride the bike very fast, so our speed was 100 and suddenly a car came from the front. Had he controlled his bike, otherwise we might not have been alive.

hahahaha, I imagine you cutting down that tree and your family watching hahahaha, and the part where the tree is supposed to look at you and smile, but you change your weapon, let it NOT be said that you don't have weapons to finish the enemy hahahahha.

Hi Boomy!

In this comment I just want to say a few words... you convinced me to buy a Predator saw!

I will plant some redwoods in my garden and wait years for them to grow before I can remove them! They're definitely going to be some damn reptilian trees!

Blocking the sun ???? Of course it must die !

Sounds like quite the big job. Now for the limb cleanup !

So many things make no sense, till YOU get there.

Are you sore all over ???

Hahaha... That's some great job you did over, wanking off some tree that was in the way, with so much melodrama... 😄

You got rid of their cubby tree didn’t you 😆

No before and after pictures so we can believe the tree was actually a decent size and not some tiny little bush that was peeking over the fence? 😃

Haha that was hilarious. It is also interesting how we want more trees and shade in the Philippines because of how hot it is, and you want more sun over there. I probably would have done the cutting myself as well. It's not everyday you can cut trees, and use an awesome tool. One might not look as cool after getting cuts and hits, but it sure would be a cool feeling doing it.

Am surprised you didn't pop a bill through the neighbour's letterbox! Their bloody job to keep their tree in check, the fluffing b'stards!

Yo antes de cortar preferiblemente seria un poco de gasolina y un fósforo. Quemado seria mejor y adios árbol.

I am saddened and ashamed. Why did you not call upon your ancestral druid magic to awaken the tree and send it on a rampage across the city? Instead, you wound it and let it seethe with rage. You have made a foe of the treefolk.

Medal of bravery required for felling skills, words used with descriptive meaning. _{Thanks for links to learn more} Aha the English language!

Saving pennies adds up to pounds, you did the right thing hope you tossed the branches back for the owner to clear 🙃.

Now you got rid of all that frustration, enjoy the scratches and carry them with pride.

!BEER it's deserved.

I am looking forward to the even bigger battle that bestows you now. The fucking roots. Bastards so they are.

We, collectively, need more of this can-do spirit. I remember growing up in the 70's my dad would tackle any job. The last house my wife and I owned had a paper birch tree that I had to put out of its misery because it was growing towards the house. I swear it had roots halfway to China but that wasn't the worst part. The worst of it was the nosey neighbor who lived halfway down the block who thought it was appropriate to walk down and chastise me was I was cutting it down because she said it was a "rare tree". I think I made up some brand new swear words right there on the spot that day. Another great one my friend! Thanks for the chuckles.

Don't be afraid of Mímir's fury now! 😄 You'll need more than those nail clippers!

The music is a hit!