RE: Awareness, Clarity, Knowledge, Healing.
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My dear, the agony of loosing a Loved one to the cold hands of death is better felt than understood. I have lost two, I have felt the agony, I have vented my anger on everything and everyone, including myself. A part of you dies and it actually doesn't go away no matter how much time has gone by. But there's only one solace that I can think of; everyone will go the same way someday. So please don't blame yourself, you wouldn't have wished that upon him and I would you rather dwell on the good memories you have of him.
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It doesn't go away and with way I'm feeling, everything seems not to matter anymore. It's surprising how people would ask you to move on, when the pain gets harder everyday. It's the only pain that never goes away with time. I can attest because everyday it gets harder for me to accept.
It's a raw wound and a very deep one at that. It's not going away soon, no no but your brother would want you to live for the both of you, to achieve for the both of you and to accomplish for the both of you. So while you mourn, think on these