My Worst Fear, A Blessing In Disguise

I awoke one morning and could not find myself. Hold on for a few seconds. I don't mean my physical body is dissolving, but the core of me on the inside seems to be slipping away with each passing day, and there appears to be nothing I can do to assist myself.

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I was so brain drained and gradually, I developed a hatred for getting out of bed and carrying out my regular chores. Things I used to enjoy doing became difficult jobs to accomplish. Even when I tried, I became easily distracted and spent too much time whining about how unfair life has become rather than accomplishing the necessary tasks.

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I mean, when was life ever fair, and when did it become important to me? The me I used to know was never concerned with how fair or unfair the world around her was; all she cared about was getting things done when they needed to be done. So, what changed, and when? I had no idea since I was so in denial of how I genuinely felt.

I began to draw attention mostly to the negativities around me and sideline the good things happening to me. Where did I go? Where is that valiant girl I used to know myself to be? Where was that supper girl who can handle any huddle life throws her way? What had happened to her, and how can I get her back?

Even though I don't want to accept it, that has been my circumstance for quite some time. Until three weeks ago, one of my worst fears came true. Apparently, it turned out to be a huge blessing in disguise. My light went out one gorgeous morning; someone or a bunch of thieves had taken two vital wires from our light transformer, and only God knows when we'll be able to get our light back.

Thrawn into darkness, the first voice to speak in my thoughts was the typical negative one. "Oh my, your light has gone out, and your husband is away for a few weeks. How are you going to deal with only you and your kid in this house without enough light to power your electronics? You understand how much you rely on the light for your internet activity.

I immediately got out of my chair and proceeded straight into the room, where I stood in front of my bedroom mirror. I glanced in the mirror and said, "Damn you, negative voice, not now, not again, and never." "I don't care what happens to our light or how long it takes to get it back; you know what? Maybe it's for the best. I've been feeling too comfortable in this place; it's time I get out and lived more."

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That was a powerful moment for me; I felt powerful and different in a wonderful way after such a long period. I felt my soul come alive, stronger than ever. That day, my son and I spent some quality time with a buddy. Days later, we spent time with more friends and these days, we would go for long walks, watched sunsets, and sang to the moon at night.

My sleep improved dramatically; I began to love my sleep and no longer felt guilty when I needed to nap, and I gave in. As the days pass, when I wake up from bed, I no longer detest day breaks or struggle to complete my daily responsibilities. Whether or not I obtained light to power my gadgets didn't matter; I was living, having fun, and regaining control of my creative brain.

During those two weeks, I conducted a lot of self-reflection and self-seeking, identifying areas where I needed to improve. It turns out that putting my phone aside and limiting my screen time had a significant positive impact on my mental health. It was a wake-up call for me to spend more time away from screens, get out more, reconnect with friends, and meet new people. Because it is so enjoyable to do so.

If there is one thing I've learned from all of this, it's that, while my job requires me to spend a lot of time in front of a screen, I must make a conscious effort to limit how much time I spend on online activities.

Fortunately, our power was restored five days ago, and now all I have to do is find a way to balance my online and offline interests, as well as my entire social life.

One of my worst fears is being without adequate electricity, but who would have imagined that this would actually teach me a very important lesson? It ended up being the necessary wake-up call for me.

The End✍️

Thank you so much for reading my story, have a lovely time at your end.
@funshee🤗❣️🥰🙏