CNF #137..... So lame.

As an experienced teacher with over a decade worth of experience, I can attest to the fact that kids will always come up with weak excuses in order to ditch an assignment or skip a particular assigned task. I have a lot of funny memories as per touching this subject that I fear sharing it might be inexhaustible.

Six years ago, I was working with a particular primary school situated at Surulere area of Lagos State. The environment was nice and conducive for learning with modern amenities for children's enjoyment. I was posted to Basic two class and I liked my students immediately as they were a bit older and would not give me so much stress or so I thought.

It was mandatory for teachers to give homework to the students everyday especially in English and Mathematics subjects. Failure to do so would attract a query. I was dutifully carrying out my tasks as a class teacher. Marking students notes promptly and giving them their assignments regularly.

At first, I didn't notice any slip ups but soon, some kids began to show me their true colours.

“Benita, why are not writing the note on the board with the others?” I asked a student in my class whom I found sitting idly.

“Ma, my hand is swollen. I cannot write anymore” she replied.

I walked up to her to check out the said swollen hand but I found nothing out of the ordinary. “Your hand is not swollen Benita. Why did you say it was swollen?”

“Mistress, can't you see this finger, it is swollen. I cannot write anymore for today” she insisted.

I knew her trick and so I let her rest for a while. Soon it was time for lunch break and this same little girl used those hands to eat up her lunch of boiled yam and egg sauce.

I allowed her eat to her fill then I called her to my table and inquired about her hand.

She replied with “The swelling has gone down after I finished eating”. I wanted to laugh at the her chubby display of jocularity but she needed to know that giving weak excuses was not a way out.

Another time around, a little boy in my class didn't submit his homework. I couldn't even find his textbooks in his bag and so I called him over to my table to also inquire what happened.

“Segun, where did you put your homework? I couldn't find it in your school bag just now”.

He placed his pointer finger on his temple acting like he was in deep thought. I knew that this would end in another weak excuse submission but I allowed him act out his script.

“Em…Mistress, I did not do my homework. I was very busy” he responded.

“Okay, can you outline the things you were busy with?” I asked him.

“We went to church then my mummy took me to a wedding party and Sunday was church again. So I could not find time to do my homework”.

“Really?” I nudged and he nodded in affirmation. Holding back the laughter that threatened to leave my mouth, I let him go but with a slight warning.

As if that was not enough, on my desk was an incomplete homework. I quickly checked the name on the textbook to know its owner. Seeing the name was Victor, I called for him as well and he walked up to me.

“Vick, why didn't you finish your homework? What's your reason for submitting an incomplete homework?” I inquired.

He looked first at his shoes and then at the book and said “Mistress when I was doing my homework, the power supply was cut off. So I closed the book and forgot to finish it.”

Another girl came in just then and she had teary eyes. She walked up to me and said “Mistress, my book got torn. My dog ate my book when I kept it on the chair at home”.

Bewildered, I couldn't help but roll my eyes at the list if weak excuses that made its round to me that very morning.

Did someone spray weak excuse incense in the air or what.

I should have been angry at what was happening but these kids made it so believable that I just had to play along.

I let them off with a fair warning for their homework to be submitted the next day and I shared a piece of advice concerning punctuality and diligence with them.

I'm no longer with that school and sometimes I wonder if those kids still come up with their lame excuses to avoid doing their homework.

Funnily, it is the same phenomenon with the school I am currently with. What baffles me is how the brain of these kids come up with those lame excuses at such short notice.

Anyways, I have to accept air as part of my job description now and I find ays to get those students to still do their homework irrespective of the lame excuse they try to sell.

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Thanks for reading.

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Images are mine.