I WAS INFERIOR TO MY MATES

Have you ever seen your mates from probably secondary or university days and intentionally decided to hide? If yes, you will relate more to this post. With no further ado let me jump right into it...

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Things were going very well for me, I entered into a higher institution like my mates, and even though I wasn't studying my preferred course, I was envied by my mates especially those who I entered into higher institution before them. Although I wasn't proud, it was merely a thing of joy until tragedy struck and my dad's businesses finally collapsed. It was then responsibility dawned on me. I never understood what was going on at home, I was pissed off that I was no longer getting my weekly allowance until I went home and saw things for myself.

When I went back to Warri, Delta State from my school in Port Harcourt Rivers State, the first thing that struck me was my mum coming to pick me up from the bus stop and didn't follow the normal route home. We were now living in an uncomplicated duplex which was the only property my dad had left after selling the old house alongside other houses and properties. I remember how my mum smiled when we got to the house and she saw my facial expression wondering if we came to check out how far the house project had gone.

It only struck me to realize what was truly happening when I saw my siblings coming out of the house in their house wears to greet me a welcome back. I almost shed tears when It dawned on me that things had gone worse than I imagined but I had to comport myself in front of my siblings. Later on, my mum explained everything to me, and it was clear I wouldn't be able to go back to school. At that point the only thing on my mind was getting something done to support my family, school left my agenda for over two years until I started seeing my secondary school classmates and my coursemates graduate.

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Soon enough I started seeing that many of them were entering the National Youth Service Corps (NYSC) and some were passing out. By the time I got back to school, many were getting married, and celebrating the new houses and cars they have acquired while I was struggling with feeding and paying bills in school as I was getting very minimal support from home. I will tell myself things like all will be well, it's just for a while, and school doesn't have age and mates until I started seeing my Juniors graduating, going for service, and getting married.

One time my secondary school classmates decided to have a hangout, I was added to the group where I saw almost all of them looking sophisticated and all, and out of shame I decided to leave the group and refused to answer any of them when they chatted me up privately. I came across my ex-girlfriend's friend again one time and she informed me my ex was in Port Harcourt. Thank God I was looking good that day else I would have been even more ashamed. She collected my number and called several times but I refused to pick up out of shame of knowing I was still in school while they had gone far ahead of me in life.

This was one of the things that led me into depression last year. But then I learned to be grateful for the things I have, where I am, and the experiences life has thought me when I discovered they are people who look up to me and draw inspiration. I'm not all that they are right now (not even physically close) but I'm happy I no longer feel inferior to them again. I started chatting some of them up to say Hi once in a while. Before then I even left social media (Facebook and Instagram) because most of them follow me, but I learned a man's value is not in the things he possesses but in the person he is. Since then, I started striving to be a better person.

THIS IS MY ENTRY INTO THE HIVE LEARNERS PROMPT FOR WEEK 73 EPISODE 1. YOU CAN READ ABOUT IT HERE