Not All Promises Survive Reality

I’ve always believed that a promise is a debt. Not just something we say for saying sake. Most people are fond of making promises and not fulfilling them, one thing I detest most is promising what I know I can’t do. If I open my mouth and say, “I will,” just know I’ve already thought about it because I know what it means when someone is counting on you and you disappoint them but there was a time I made a promise that I couldn’t keep, and it still pains me.

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I have this cousin she’s like a younger sister to me. We practically grew up together. She’s lived with us for years, and we became so close. When she got admission into the university, I was so happy. We all celebrated at home. That evening, I called her and told her, “Don’t worry, I’ll buy your matric clothes for you.” She was so happy, that she started shouting on the phone and telling her roommates, “My cousin is buying my matric clothes” I could hear the joy in her voice and I was just smiling. You know that kind of happiness when you feel proud that someone believes in you.

As the matric day came closer, life happened. I fell seriously ill. It wasn’t a small sickness. I was hospitalized. All the money I had saved to buy her things went straight into drugs, injections, tests, and all that. Before I knew it, everything was finished. I couldn’t even send her anything not even 1k. I just laid in that hospital bed and felt useless. I thought of her. I thought of the promise. I thought of how she must have felt, waiting and hoping. I couldn’t even call her that day. Shame no let me.

When we finally spoke, she said, “It’s fine,” but I could feel it. It wasn’t fine. This girl believed in me so much and I didn’t show up. Not because I didn’t want to but because I truly couldn’t and that’s even more painful because when someone you trust disappoints you, it’s not the money or gift that hurts it’s the hope that got dashed. That thing kept me quiet for days. I felt like I failed her and it reminded me of something that once happened to me too.

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After I finished secondary school, my uncle promised me a phone. He said, “Once you write your last paper, I’ll get you a new phone.” I was so happy. I started dreaming about the phone. I was already imagining how I’d snap pictures, open Facebook, and chat on WhatsApp. I started calling him using my mum’s phone to remind him gently. He kept saying, Next week, Don’t worry. Till today, no phone.

No explanation, no apology, nothing. The worst part is that I didn't ask him for the phone, he just promised me of his own will, this man stopped picking up my Mum's calls because he knew I was the one calling. You know that pain when someone promises you something and gives you hope, then just forgets like it’s nothing. It made me feel like I wasn’t important enough and to date, I do not like my uncle for anything, that was how he promised all my siblings and did not fulfill it.

Since the day experienced broken promises, I have known it is very bad to break someone's heart and That’s why I take promises seriously because I know what it means to be on the other side, the person who’s waiting, hoping, checking their phone, and getting nothing, it is so bad to experience.

Now I’ve learned that sometimes, even when your heart is in the right place, life can still disappoint you. You might mean your promise, but situations can mess everything up. But one thing I will always say if you can’t fulfill your promise, please explain. Just talk. Be honest. Don’t hide. Don’t ghost the person. Say the truth.

This is my response to this episode of hivelearners community prompt #hl-w172e01 which the topic is tagged A BROKEN PROMISE

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