Genes don't raise children - Habits do

There is no formula when it comes to grooming a child, but I can say the ways of the parents have an impact on the life of a child.

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I have often seen statements on how some pastors' children are wayward in life and how it is not supposed to be so because of the status and the position their father holds in society, but then, do we ever wonder if those pastors have time for their children and if they are grooming them in the right way, or are they busy with their career.

Then we have the children of a humble family who act so decent and responsible, maybe this is because their parent dedicate their life to nurturing them... This is not always the reason, but then it could be!

Personally, I believe the actions and ways of life, and the availability of parents, shape the children's life and behavior, but sometimes some children learn lessons from their parents and vow never to repeat the same mistake.

A good example is a man who married 2 wives and gave birth to 2 sons... When the sons grew up, one of them married more than one wife, while the second one only married one wife, when they were asked the reason behind their decision...

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The first son said he married more than 1 wife because his father did the same thing, while the second son said he married only one wife because he did not want to repeat the mistake of his father, which cost them peace in the family... So our children will always have their own mindset too.

Behaviours are not inherited; they are learned. If a father smokes, there is a possiblity for one of his children to take that habit from him, if a father womanizes, one of his kids might copy him, if a woman gossips, one or two of her children may also take the act from her and this is why we must always act responsibly in front of our kids, they might not follow what we say but they watch our every actions.

Over-pampering is part of our actions that determines the behavior of our child. We were brought up in a humble family, so we learned to appreciate even the little things. However, because we were fortunate enough to succeed in life, we sometimes throw caution to the wind and over-pamper our kids, forgetting our own upbringing that has taken us to the position we are in today.

We can only try our best as parents; we will guide them and show them the right path, but it depends on the children to follow it.

In the end, our habits play a big role in the lives of our kids, so we must learn to exhibit good ones.

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