Binning insensitivity - LOH #245

There was a comment I came across on a post, one particular day. The commenter said that we are taught to start writing with pencils as kids, but as we grow, it is changed to a pen. This is because as kids, it's easier to erase mistakes but as grown people, we have to live with the consequences of our mistakes, whether good or bad. This statement struck me so deeply that I had to pause everything I was doing to let it sink in. To be honest, this wasn't something I ever thought towards or even something I think I'd have thought out myself in future (or maybe I'd have, later on).

However, as humans, these mistakes are inevitable. Even when we ask for advice, we often times, go ahead to do that which our instinct tells us to do. We follow that which seems best to us, ignoring whatever idea or way out, others have proposed. The ladies of hive community posed an emotional question relating to our relationships with people, this week and since I'm a lover of questions like these, why not?

hearing certain words after making a mistake and feeling judged and attacked by the deepest part of our being, what do you think of this phrase : "I told you so?" Would you also say it to someone else?

First things first, for someone that's already saddled with the consequence of his or her mistake, why add to whatever the person is feeling at that moment? I know sometimes, there's satisfaction in saying the obvious but one thing that I make conscious effort to never be, is insensitive. For someone who is already judging himself or herself, telling the person "I told you so" is like rubbing salt on a sore wound. I bet you that person already remembered the fact that I warned him against doing it. Adding to his grief meant confirming it.

If I advice someone against something and the person does another, it is not my place to remind him or her. At that moment, I could offer a hug, hold their hands or just sit with them, basking in our space saddled with words better left unsaid. Everytime words seem to fail us, gestures save the day. If you find yourself in a situation like that, and the only thing that is at the tip of your tongue, is to talk of how things would have been better had they followed your advice, please just sit with that person in silence, hold their hands, hug them or do whatever. Just don't say it. I assure you the pain of confirming one's painful thoughts, is worse than just harbouring the thought itself.

There's a saying that goes along the lines of mistakes either making or marring us. Mistakes are determining factors in who we turn out to be. So my answer to this is pretty simple. I am making conscious effort to be a better person daily, and insensitivity is something I'm cutting down to the barest minimum and that is why I'd not say this to someone, be it one who's hurting or not. That's because they definitely explored that thought in their minds so, I let them just be.

This is my response to the prompt for the week dear ladies. Let's all live, laugh, and be there for each other in the ways that matter the most.

Thanks for reading.

Image is mine.