Too Much Time, Yet Not Enough

Sometimes I will wake up and have lots of activities for the day either go to the store for groceries or attending to some clients but before I know it the time will just fly as if someone else is controlling it, it will be so short that I will have to suspend some activities and move it to the next day while sometimes I will be begging the time to fly as usual because it would be crawling but either ways your time depends on how you spend it and what you achieve for the day.

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Truth is, I procrastinate a lot. I don’t even try to sugarcoat it anymore. I can sit for hours just saying "I’ll do it soon" and end up doing nothing. My phone is usually the biggest distraction. I’ll pick it to just check one thing and next thing I’ve wasted one full hour, moving from one app to another. I hate how I feel afterwards. I’ll be angry at myself but still do it again the next day. It’s like a cycle I’m struggling to break.

There are days I try. I make mental lists or even write them down, small tasks I want to do. I don’t always finish them but I feel better when I tick even two or three things. I feel more in control on those days. But they don’t happen often. Most times I just go with the flow and hope the day ends without me feeling useless.

I don’t think it’s about how many hours we have. I think it’s about discipline. And I struggle with that. I know I should use my time better, I know time is not coming back, but still, I waste it. Not every day, but more than I should. I try to blame other things, but the truth is I just get lazy sometimes. Or unmotivated. Or tired. Or all at once.

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After I do the few things I manage to do in a day, I just rest. Resting sounds responsible but sometimes what I’m doing isn’t rest, it’s just avoidance. I’ll say I’m taking a break but deep down I know I’m avoiding tasks. Most times I just sit and do nothing.

There are things I’ve started cutting off. Arguing with people for no reason is one. Especially online. It’s draining. Before, I used to reply comments, try to explain my view, even debate small. Now I just scroll past. Everyone wants to talk. Nobody is listening. Another thing I’ve stopped giving time to is overthinking. I used to lie down and think about everything that’s not working in my life. Hours will pass and I’ll be in the same spot. I still do it sometimes but not as much. I try to distract myself before I go too deep.

Also, gossip. I didn’t think it was a big deal but now I know it’s just noise. It doesn’t help me in any way. It’s just extra weight. So when people start talking about others, I try not to join. Sometimes I walk away or stay quiet. It’s better that way.

Procrastination is a thief of time but through discipline we can overcome it and achieve the best goal, time wait for no one, how you use your time depends on wise or foolish you are, there are things we need to cut off in other to get the best out of every day.

This is my response to this week's episode of #smp weekly prompt #smp-w25