The advice my daddy gave me

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The advice my daddy gave me

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My dad has given me lots of wise advice over the years about being careful who I choose as friends and how peer influence can shape me, for better or worse. He frequently cautions me that who I spend time with and confide in will profoundly impact the person I become.

One of his most common phrases is "show me your friends and I'll show you your future." By this he means my friends are like a crystal ball reflecting back the direction my life is headed. If I surround myself with responsible, ambitious people, I'm likely to become the same. But running with a reckless crowd predicts I'll soon be making poor choices too.

Dad warns me to avoid having bad friends or hanging around those who make bad decisions. He says they will drag me down to their level through peer pressure to fit in. There's an old saying that "one bad apple spoils the whole bunch." My dad believes this is true when it comes to friend influence. One troubled friend can incite a whole group to compromise their values in order to conform.

That's why dad says I need to be extremely careful who I let into my inner circle. He advises looking for trustworthy friends who share my values and will bring out the best in me, not the worst. Surrounding myself with other responsible, thoughtful individuals will encourage me to make good choices too. But running with a dicey crowd means I'll likely lose my way.

Dad often uses the analogy that character is like a tower made of Jenga blocks. Each friend I add in life is another block placed on my character. Good friends stack up and reinforce my integrity. But the wrong friends can be like a shaky block that brings the whole tower down. So I need to build my friendships carefully, placing only solid blocks, in order to construct a stable character that won't collapse.

My dad cautions it’s dangerous to think I can change or "fix" a friend headed down the wrong path. More often than not, I'll end up pulled down too if I stay connected. He quotes an old saying that "if you lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas." His advice is to cut ties at the first signs of trouble before a damaging friendship takes root and wrecks my reputation and values.

Another thing dad warns is that a toxic friend can corrupt someone's morals and direction in subtle, incremental ways without them realizing it at first. As the old saying goes, "By beholding, we become changed." It's human nature to start conforming to those we spend time with. No one joins a bad crowd expecting to go morally downhill. It happens slowly, like water dripping on a stone day after day. But over time, even solid rock gives way to steady influence.

So my dad stresses that I need to watch myself carefully and evaluate how I'm changing, especially when spending time with new friends. If I catch myself compromising my standards - whether in speech, behaviors, or morals - because of peer influence, it’s time to step back from those relationships. Am I making excuses for things I know are wrong but want to rationalize because all my friends are doing them? That's a big red flag I’m being swayed in the wrong direction.

Dad cautions that the impact of a morally compromised friend spreads like a virus if I don’t address it quickly. As one bad apple spoils the whole barrel, one reckless friend can stir up foolish behavior among my whole group. My dad says establishing wise boundaries, disciplines, and standards early on can prevent the spread of damaging influence. Removing a dangerous friend firmly and swiftly at the first signs of trouble can save me from a whole network of regret later.

In summary, my dad offers this advice to steer me away from future misery: Be slow to trust new people with your confidences and inner circle. Carefully weigh whether their values and choices stack up. Watch for early red flags of poor character. Don’t think you can change a friend already making bad decisions - more often the bad decisions will start changing you. Sever ties at the first sign of danger before a harmful relationship takes root. Let wisdom rather than peer pressure guide your choices, even if it means standing alone.

While it’s sometimes hard advice to follow, I’m grateful my dad takes time to share these insights for protecting my future. His counsel provides guardrails to help me stay on a path of integrity as I journey through life and navigate new friendships along the way. When I feel tempted to fit in or cave to peer pressure, I remember his wise words. Surrounding myself with people who bring out my best is key to becoming the person I aspire to be.

Thank you so much for reading my post.

This is my response to Hiveghana prompt