Peace over confrontation

Growing up, I noticed the one thing that my family is known for, which is "peacemaking" Often I'd just be and question myself about my kind of family, why they don't like making trouble, and why they would prefer to make peace. No wonder my cousin named us "the peacemakers".

Everyone has found themselves in situations where you get to decide what happens, and in situations like this, there are two things involved; either you continue in causing a scene that might lead to something else or you try as much as you can to settle whatever is going on and let peace reign like my aunty will say "instead of trouble rain should fall".

Important advice "Don't involve yourself in any kind of monthly contributions with others" I think those from my part of the world would understand better but I'm still gonna explain. Two years back I just graduated from the University, I got a job, my reason for getting a job was to support myself in getting my final year clearance done.

Fortunately, my coursemate from the University was also working there, he brought up the idea that we form a small unit and engage in a monthly contribution and that it would enable our savings to grow better, no doubt that was brilliant. What's a monthly contribution? In my part of the world, two or more people come together to start a contribution, now they are gonna have an agreement that by the end of every month, everyone is gonna contribute a fixed amount of money from their salary to give to one member of the group, now for the next month they would do the same thing and give to another person, just like that till it gets to the last person.

Everything started smoothly, I never expected anything to hinder the contribution but then life can be unpredictable sometimes.

Source Link
When it finally got my turn, and every other person had sent their portion of the contribution to me except for my coursemate, at first I thought he was having issues with his bank and couldn't initiate a transfer, so I gave him some time, after a week I didn't see anything from him and at that time we weren't at the same workplace, so I wasn't seeing him, I didn't know where he lived, the only means of communication I can use to reach him was through phone call and you know what the worst part was, he wasn't taking my calls nor returning them.

Did I stop calling? Well, I didn't stop, I called till one day his big sister picked up the call and was saying all sorts of things to me, in her words "You are not the first person they are owing even the federal government of Nigeria is owing people" then I told her I'm not in any way related to the federal government and besides her brother and everyone involved in the contribution had an agreement so he should fulfill his part which he owes to me, the funny part that got to me was when she warned me to stop calling him, and at that moment something started boiling inside of me "I know it was anger but this particular anger was different".

image is mine

Different thoughts started roaming my head, I told my sister I was gonna find my way to his house and see what his big sister would do, I hadn't gotten angry like that before, also, the kind of words his sister used on me even made me eager to see her, so I called my friend who happens to have an idea of where the guy lives, that was how I left the house to his place, the funny part I didn't know my sister followed me to the place, after coming down from cab I saw my sister behind me.

When we got to his flat, we knocked and he came out, now a normal me would have screamed and created a movie kind of scene where people would gather and watch whatever was going to happen but I didn't, I don't know how I was able to maintain a calm tone. I looked at him, and the first question I asked was "Why aren't you taking my calls?" He said he didn't know how to express himself to me, and I was like "Express yourself" In the process of talking with him, his sister came out, and with the whole anger I came with, I didn't look at her twice cause if I do, something will happen, I just left without the money or anything, when I got home I called him and told him to forget about the money. I was very pissed at the words his sister used on me but then I didn't want to destroy our friendship and also I've learned my lesson never to involve myself in such things again.

Thanks for reading🌹