𝓜𝔂 𝓜𝓸𝓶𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓞𝓯 𝓖𝓻𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓽𝓾𝓭𝓮 - Wednesday 6 August 2025

Though I did some serious rewiring already, I am starting to see how stuck I have been in that scarcity mindset.

Limiting myself for decades....

Because planning a future feels like a luxury when survival is the focus.

These posts are:

𝒯𝑜 𝓊𝓃𝒹𝑜 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒹𝒶𝓂𝒶𝑔𝑒 𝐼 𝒹𝒾𝒹 𝓉𝑜 𝓂𝓎𝓈𝑒𝓁𝒻 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓂𝓎 𝒷𝑒𝓁𝒾𝑒𝒻 𝒾𝓃 𝒶𝒷𝓊𝓃𝒹𝒶𝓃𝒸𝑒.
𝒯𝑜 𝒷𝑒 𝑔𝓇𝒶𝓉𝑒𝒻𝓊𝓁 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓌𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝐼 𝒽𝒶𝓋𝑒.
𝒯𝑜 𝓊𝓃𝓉𝒶𝓃𝑔𝓁𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓇𝑒𝓈𝓉 𝑜𝒻 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓌𝒾𝓇𝑒𝓈 𝒾𝓃 𝓂𝓎 𝓈𝒸𝒶𝓇𝒸𝒾𝓉𝓎 𝓂𝒾𝓃𝒹𝓈𝑒𝓉.
𝒯𝑜 𝓇𝑒𝑜𝓅𝑒𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒹𝑜𝑜𝓇𝓈 𝑜𝒻 𝓅𝑒𝓇𝒸𝑒𝓅𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃, 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓇𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓂𝒷𝑒𝓇 𝓌𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝐼 𝓀𝓃𝑒𝓌 𝒷𝑒𝒻𝑜𝓇𝑒.

Who Am I, that most intriguing of questions, is still floating around, but let´s see.

Here’s a self-description profile written in the voice of the author based on the text you provided:

Who I Am

I am a seeker of truth within myself.

For years, I lived as though life was something that happened to me, guided by unconscious patterns and silent traumas I didn’t yet recognize.

But then the moment arrived that I began making the unconscious conscious, and everything changed.

I realized that the narratives I carried of scarcity, unworthiness, and fear of failure were not unchangeable facts, but inherited scripts I had the power to rewrite. Or wounds that I could heal, if you prefer that option.

I believe in facing my shadows, my dragons, and my demons.

I’m not afraid to look into the parts of myself that once felt too painful to confront.
Once I ignored them, pretended they were not there, and they weren´t. They were part of my unconscious drivers, but they were not there as I did not acknowledge them.

Am I making sense?

I never felt I was a survivor, accepting scarcity, and afraid to make a wrong move that would cause my mission to fail. That part of me did not exist in my mind, but unconsciously drove my behavior.

The unworthiness, well, I started to see that first, I started to see how I would put the needs of others above mine, my mind told me it was because I am a survivor, I am strong, I do not need a soft hand.

Which is true, but by denying myself that, I denied the part of me that could give that soft hand to others, to others.

And at the same time, I denied myself pleasure and relaxation, which is part of being a well-balanced and properly functioning human being.

Through self-reflection, journaling, and emotional honesty, I’ve learned to face discomfort, to feel deeply, and to alchemize that pain into growth.

Emotions are no longer obstacles to me but gateways to the next levels, tears are like water, nurturing the roots of my soul.

I value forgiveness, not just as an act towards others, but as a radical act of self-liberation.

By forgiving myself, I’ve shed layers of resentment and anger that kept me tethered to old wounds.

I am a person who chooses.

I choose what to believe, what to focus on, and how to define my own narrative.
I choose not to ignore any part of me; instead, I shine light on what I held hidden in the shadows for so long. I give room to all of me, and try to understand the parts that feel uncomfortable, so I can embrace them and make them an accepted part of the whole of me.

I believe in my right to rewrite the stories of lack into stories of abundance, of survival into thriving, of fear into empowered presence.

Words are my medium to paint emotions.
Through them, I explore, release, and recreate my inner world.

Every experience, every feeling, every shadow I encounter becomes part of the evolving tapestry of Who I Am.

I see life as a journey toward wholeness, where each moment of awareness brings me closer to peace, authenticity, and alignment with the deeper self, and perhaps, or maybe certain...... with something divine.

Thank you for making it this far....for those who know me...or better, think they know me, this might have been a WTF moment.

For me, this is a WTF journey, but I finally know my destiny: Avalon and reaching it with a balanced mind.

Reaching it aware of my wounds, my traumas, and working on that balancing act that could make the mind reach its full potential.

Not that I think I will be able to reach perfection in one lifetime or ten, but I at least looked at things from both sides now.

But be aware, a balanced mind might hide the unseen war between outer silence and inner chaos, never revealing that balance is seemingly and in truth only is a mask, a trap.

Those who are seemingly balanced are the ones that I trust most, because being human means repressed trauma, emotional imbalance, and above all others psychological duality.

Like Rudyard Kipling´s (1865 – 1936) IF

If you can keep your head when all about you

Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

But make allowance for their doubting too;

Because I looked,

I looked at my mind from both sides now,
From up and down, and still somehow
It's my mind´s illusions I recall
I really don't know my mind at all