𝓜𝔂 𝓜𝓸𝓶𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓞𝓯 𝓖𝓻𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓽𝓾𝓭𝓮 - Thursday 17 July 2025

Though I did some serious rewiring already, I am starting to see how stuck I have been in that scarcity mindset.

Limiting myself for decades....

Because planning a future feels like a luxury when survival is the focus.

These posts are:

𝒯𝑜 𝓊𝓃𝒹𝑜 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒹𝒶𝓂𝒶𝑔𝑒 𝐼 𝒹𝒾𝒹 𝓉𝑜 𝓂𝓎𝓈𝑒𝓁𝒻 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓂𝓎 𝒷𝑒𝓁𝒾𝑒𝒻 𝒾𝓃 𝒶𝒷𝓊𝓃𝒹𝒶𝓃𝒸𝑒.
𝒯𝑜 𝒷𝑒 𝑔𝓇𝒶𝓉𝑒𝒻𝓊𝓁 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓌𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝐼 𝒽𝒶𝓋𝑒.
𝒯𝑜 𝓊𝓃𝓉𝒶𝓃𝑔𝓁𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓇𝑒𝓈𝓉 𝑜𝒻 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓌𝒾𝓇𝑒𝓈 𝒾𝓃 𝓂𝓎 𝓈𝒸𝒶𝓇𝒸𝒾𝓉𝓎 𝓂𝒾𝓃𝒹𝓈𝑒𝓉.
𝒯𝑜 𝓇𝑒𝑜𝓅𝑒𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒹𝑜𝑜𝓇𝓈 𝑜𝒻 𝓅𝑒𝓇𝒸𝑒𝓅𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃, 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓇𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓂𝒷𝑒𝓇 𝓌𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝐼 𝓀𝓃𝑒𝓌 𝒷𝑒𝒻𝑜𝓇𝑒.

What a day.
Not sure what to think, it started out lovely, but then.
Training someone, or at least walking them through their position and what is expected.

I think I did wonderful, but at the same time, I did not feel it. I did not feel the person on the other side of the screen. Now that might be perfectly normal, it might be just because I am the first person she speaks to and I have never been in that position.

I will give it time, but it was draining, and it made me think one thing. Draining guests is one thing; they pay for draining me.

But my employees should bring that fire.
I don´t want to have people working for me who make it feel like work.

It´s bad enough that they have to work, but it should feel light, as if they do the job because it is their path. It does not have to be a mission like mine, but at least a very satisfying feeling, and that was totally lacking today.

Now, everyone deserves a second chance, and I will have another session tomorrow. Let´s see if it was temporary, insecurity, shyness, or if this person really would never be hired by me.

I need an abundance personality that brings something to the table, not a sponge. But maybe it was me, it was my first as well, but there was this constant nagging feeling I could not ignore.

Still, I am very thankful for another great lesson learned, and one that will become incredibly important in my future.

Thank you for making it this far....for those who know me...or better, think they know me, this might have been a WTF moment.

For me, this is a WTF journey, but I finally know my destiny: Avalon.

Around 1200 AD, Geoffrey of Monmouth wrote that King Arthur was taken on a boat to Avalon by “nine sisters,” the eldest being Morgan le Fay.

Avalon, where the mists of the worlds are thin and time no longer reigns.

“The king was carried to the isle of Avalon to be healed of his wounds.”

According to legend, he did not return from Avalon, but he is prophesied to do so: Arthur is the "once and future king."

Ever since, poets and dreamers have chased that myth. I am a poet, a dreamer, a mystic, and a magician.

I will not chase the myth, I will recreate it just as she meant it to be.

Because over all these centuries, Avalon has grown, the word itself holds more power than the eyes of time can see.

The ancient Celtic legend, a sacred island of healing and immortality, shrouded in fog and guarded by priestesses.

In a quiet English village in 1897, a young writer named T.E. Wilburn sat beneath an old oak and scribbled in his journal:

“Avalon is not merely a place, it is the ache of the soul that remembers something purer than this world can offer.”

That line would later appear in his forgotten book Through the Mists, and inspire the chorus of a 1974 folk song by Rowan Shade:

“Sail away, sail away / To the isle where kings still breathe / Avalon, oh Avalon / My heart you never leave.”

To some, Avalon is paradise. To others, a metaphor for death, it might be both.

Even today, Avalon appears as a vivid symbol of hope after ruin, of wholeness beyond despair.

Avalon is more than a story.

Avalon is a compass for lost souls, pointing somewhere beyond the chaos of the world, to recovery, to rebirth, and reset.

And like Arthur, those willing will all encounter the boat to take them there.