The Gift of Waiting Without Complaining (You're Welcome, Baby)

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Fairytales are my thing. I’ve always loved the idea of magical kingdoms, talking animals, and, of course, those three mysterious guardians who pop up to sprinkle a bit of sparkle on a newborn’s life. I mean, who wouldn’t want their baby to be blessed with beauty, intelligence, and the inexplicable ability to communicate with creatures? Naturally, if I had the chance to be one of those fairy godmothers (or, let’s keep it Nigerian: fairy “aunties”), you can bet I’d take it very seriously, but also add my own flair to it.

In Nigeria, we don’t call them guardians, but naming ceremonies carry the same energy. It’s not just about picking a cute name. Parents, aunties, uncles, pastors, and the occasional family friend everyone calls “big mummy” all line up to speak blessings into the baby’s future. You’ll hear wishes for wealth, wisdom, and the ever-reliable prayer of “you will not fall into bad company.” lol.

So, if I had to channel my inner fairy guardian during such an event, I’d pick a gift that blends my love for fairytales with something practical for the baby’s journey through life. What would that be, you ask? Patience. Yes, patience.

Now hear me out. First of all, life isn’t exactly a fairytale. I mean, sure, there are occasional Cinderella moments, like when your online shopping order actually fits perfectly. But most of the time, life is more like those scenes in Shrek where everything is chaotic, loud, and a little messy. Patience is the magic that helps you survive it all without losing your mind.

Think about it: babies grow into toddlers, and toddlers are tiny agents of chaos. If this baby is going to make it through tantrums, math homework, heartbreak, and Nigeria’s infamous “network unavailable” message, they’re going to need patience. Imagine waiting two hours for NEPA to restore light while sweating through your clothes, patience is practically a survival skill here.

Now, if I were standing at the naming ceremony, wings glittering and wand in hand (yes, I’d fully commit to the costume), I’d dramatically wave my wand over the baby and say something like:

“Sweet child, I give you the gift of patience. With this, you’ll gracefully wait in traffic, listen to long stories from your elders, and survive being put on hold for hours when calling customer care. This gift will keep you calm when life tests you, and trust me, it will. You’ll learn to wait without frustration and endure without losing hope. It won’t always be easy, but it’ll always be worth it.”

I imagine the parents would clap politely while silently thinking, “But where’s the gift of money?” And honestly, fair question. But I’d argue that patience is what you need to make wise financial decisions, so technically, it’s connected, (says the broke fairy aunty).

In the spirit of fairytales, patience is the gift that ties everything together. After all, every good story has moments where the hero has to wait it out. Cinderella had to endure years of scrubbing floors before her prince showed up. Rapunzel waited in that tower forever before Flynn came along. Even in Nigerian folktales, patience shows up often, think of Tortoise in the folklore, who always outsmarts others by playing the long game (and being very cunning, but I digress).

Of course, as a proper fairy guardian, I wouldn’t stop at just granting patience. I’d add a touch of humor, because what’s patience without a bit of sarcasm? Life is unpredictable, and being able to laugh when things go sideways is a gift in itself. So maybe my wand would sparkle twice, and I’d add:

“Oh, and may you never take yourself too seriously. You shall be full of wits, humor and sarcasm.”

Being a fairy guardian sounds fun, but it also comes with responsibility. If I had the chance, I’d want my gift to be meaningful, practical, and lasting. Patience may not sound as exciting as the ability to talk to birds or turn things to gold, but it’s the one thing that’ll help this baby navigate both the magical and dull parts of life.

And who knows? Maybe one day, this baby will grow up and tell their kids about the random fairy guardian who gave them the gift that made all the difference. Until then, I’ll be here, waiting patiently, because hey, I’ve already mastered the art myself.

Thank you for reading! :)