✨ Christmas can be bittersweet for some people ✨

For many years I have not known how to define my “Christmas self”. I used to be fascinated by these dates and I always looked forward to them with joy, I knew it meant getting together with the family and making hallacas. Beyond receiving gifts, what was expected was that exciting sharing with the family.

However, due to the loss of a close relative, added to the country's situation, the celebration changed drastically. The feeling of sadness invaded the atmosphere and, at the same time, the massive emigration began, which caused loneliness to hit harder and harder. These were two events that came in combo and from then on, nothing was the same.

Years later, another bereavement occurred and that person had a December 1st birthday and also died at the end of the same month... so these dates are not pleasant for me at all, since the month starts I just wish to open my eyes and for it to be January. I don't know if at some point my perception will change, at least, I am not the Grinch I was before and I can eat a hallaca without feeling bad.

I have many years without setting up the tree and decorating with excitement for Christmas, for me it's the same thing to do it or not. ⚠️ Although... some decorations had to be hidden for their safety, thanks to two little animals who were fascinated with leaving poop in the manger, throwing the baby Jesus on the floor and peeing on the tree, (among other evils) ⚠️. I was laughing my head off, but my mother was not amused.

It is not the same for everyone...

In this month I prefer to talk about empathy, I will not be the person who will be criticizing how others spend these dates, because the experience is very individual and will depend on the personal situations of each person. Some people have a lot to celebrate and others don't, you just have to put yourself in the shoes of others, not forcing anyone to be “happy” or to make the other person's day bitter.

Just as deciding whether or not to celebrate these dates is a personal experience, so is how it is done. For some it is the typical Christmas dinner, a day of premieres, lots of gifts, there are those who play secret friend or do any other type of dynamic. For others it may simply be spending it in pajamas and watching a movie until they fall asleep.

There is no single way to celebrate, it can be in many ways and this has to be normalized, there are people who get very heavy about it, trying to force their children to hang out with a family member they don't get along with or to do something they are not comfortable with. My full support to anyone who reads this post and has to be forced to share a table with someone who has hurt them because they have nowhere else to go.

Get out of Social Networks!

It is known that half of the things that are shared are half-truths or lies. You cannot measure the level of happiness by a photograph or a video, behind that there may be much more: the need to look good and want to cover up a reality by pretending that “everything is fine”. The background of showing too much may be the opposite, trying to hide the fact that there is a void.

That's why I don't have much faith in those photos where you see the whole family, all happy and smiling... or those who travel and upload Instagram stories every two seconds. Where is the enjoyment if they spend it with the phone stuck in their hand? Still, it can hurt someone who is depressed, lonely, grieving, or recently divorced.

For those of us who don't connect at the moment with this celebration, it's imperative to stop looking at social media so we don't feel any pressure. It is complicated when they write and wish “Merry Christmas” or “Happy New Year” and you are not in that same emotion or Christmas tune. I used to answer immediately so as not to look bad, but now I focus more on how I feel and I do it when I am comfortable.

I have yet to resignify these dates in my own way, it is already a step to not feel so off when December arrives, meanwhile, I wish all those who do have their Christmas self super active 💪 to have an incredible time during these dates, eat until you can't move and celebrate with your loved ones 🎉.

Thanks to @damarysvibra for encouraging interaction with this initiative. A hug to the whole Holos&Lotus community 🤗.

Por muchos años no he sabido definir bien mi "yo navideño". Antes me fascinaban estas fechas y siempre las esperaba con alegría e ilusión, sabía que significaba reunirse con la familia y hacer hallacas. Porque más allá de recibir regalos, lo que se esperaba era ese agradable compartir con la familia.

Sin embargo, debido a una pérdida de un familiar cercano, sumado a la situación país, la celebración fue cambiando drásticamente. El sentimiento de tristeza invadió el ambiente y, al mismo tiempo, la emigración masiva comenzó, lo que causó que la soledad golpeara cada vez más fuerte. Fueron dos sucesos que vinieron en combo y de ahí en adelante, nada fue igual.

Años después, ocurrió otro luto y esa persona cumplía el primero de diciembre y también murió a finales del mismo mes… así que estas fechas no son agradables para mí en absoluto, desde que empieza el mes sólo deseo abrir los ojos y que sea enero. No sé si en algún momento cambie mi percepción, al menos, ya no soy el Grinch que era antes y puedo comerme una hallaca sin sentirme mal.