The Child We Raise Vs The Adult They Become.

When it comes to the whole matter of behavior, whether it is learned or inherited, I personally feel like it’s a mixture of both, because let’s be honest, some children just come into this world with a certain vibe already, you will see one baby that is calm, quiet, and gentle, and you will see another baby that is already fighting the nurse during birth, nobody taught them anything yet, but their personalities are already showing, so yes, some things are already inside a child from the beginning.

But at the same time, what a child grows up seeing also shapes them a lot, you know how they always say in Nigeria, “House wey person dey grow determine how him eye go take see life.” It’s true, A child who grows up in a home where respect is normal will likely show respect too, and a child who grows up in a place where shouting and insult is the communication method, the child might pick that up too, children are very observant, they watch more than they listen.

But here is the twist , even with good upbringing, the child can still turn out somehow, i have seen it with my own eyes, You will see parents that are kind, soft-spoken, God-fearing, always teaching right and wrong, yet the child will still choose a different path, You will see the parents worrying, praying, advising, correcting , but the child already has stubbornness rooted like yam, Sometimes it is peer pressure, sometimes it is external influence from school or neighborhood, and sometimes, it is just that the child has their own personality and their mind is set.

On the other side, we also see children that grow up in very rough environments maybe their parents were fighting every day, or maybe there was no stable home, or the child was raised by relatives who barely cared, Yet, the child grows up and becomes responsible, focused, respectful, and even successful, Some people look at their situation and say, “This life wey I dey see here, I no want am for my future.” And that mindset alone pushes them to be better.

So sometimes, it is not about the parents at all , it is the child that decides the kind of adult they want to become.

But also, let us not forget that society plays a huge role, once children step outside the house ,into school, friendships, social media, environment they begin to compare, observe, copy, and learn from others, many times, the world shapes them more than their home does, that is why parents can only do their best but cannot completely control who the child becomes.

And you see this thing called communication , it plays a big role too, some parents only shout and beat without explaining anything, the child does not understand why something is wrong, they only know they should not get caught, while some parents talk to their children, reason with them, explain consequences, and show love, children raised with communication usually grow up more emotionally balanced.

So to me, the factors that determine the kind of adult someone becomes include their upbringing, their environment, their friendships, their own personality, and sometimes just life experiences, and in Nigeria, we also believe in one more thing grace and prayer, because sometimes, even after all the good training, it is still God that guides a person’s steps.

So yes, behavior is both learned and inherited, a child can come into the world with their own nature, but life will test, reshape, teach, and mold them along the way, at the end of the day, it’s the mixture of everything , nature, nurture, exposure, and personal choice that determines who someone becomes.

_{This is my entry to Hive Learners Prompt Week 190, Edition 3}

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_{Image Is Mine}

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