Tough To Shape.

It was a simple gist that generated a sensitive conversation when my friend said “She kept herself in check until this day because she believes her value is worth more than anything in the world”.
Not diving into the details of our conversation, but really we were just wondering how people do live life depending on another for survival.

And of course, not to forget that life hits people differently, and we react to it differently too but in truth.. We all still got the power of choice neatly placed on our palms.

It's sad to mention how a handful of my gender has successfully upgraded the infamous prostitution base into a more advanced face of hookup, which has now proven easier and highly functional base. I'm definitely in no position to judge anyone and I will state my reason before the end of these notes.
In my friend's words “She grew up with the mentality that going intimate with a man because of money means she's worth the amount of whatever she's been paid thereafter. That's to say if sleeping with someone would earn her fifty thousand naira for instance, that makes her worth “fifty thousand naira” and it made perfect sense to her.

It's a different thing for me though, and I give that to my parents for having inculcated that mindset into me. I doubt they know what they were doing those days when they gave us hundreds of thousands to count daily. There came a time when I was always anticipating my mom or dad calling us over to their room to help them count money. And it was so that we knew the money wasn't ours to collect and so there was never a day we had evil thoughts on stealing from our parents and I could confidently say so because in all those years, there wasn't any cost of alarm over missing money.

I don't know if my elder brother learned from any of that or if he had the same idea of thoughts that ran through my head whenever we were called by our parents because feeling those cash in my hands unknowingly motivated me into wanting to make my own someday. And even when things fell out for my parents, my mom's fear of having me wayward because she felt I might not be able to deal with the hardship alongside the fact that I became exposed to the world the moment I began working.
Not to mention how the fastest way to turn me off in a talking stage is by bringing money in first.. I didn't lack a thing when my parents could afford whatever I needed and even when they couldn't anymore it didn't quench the already fired spirit that had already been lite up from my childhood.

In essence, I just think anyone who believes illegal work is the only way is because they haven’t gotten a strong “WHY” to deter them from that path.
My childhood experience with money isn’t my strong “WHY” on living life on the part I choose but it was the genesis of where I am today and the mentality I live with up till this day.
Probably choices aren’t applicable in all cases and this is the part you hear people complain “I didn’t have a choice”..
and I quite understand that aspect even if I haven’t once allowed myself fall into such a situation, but not disputing there’s always a two side to a coin..
even if both side got the end zone, that is still a choice on our path to consider and alas move according to the direction we choose for ourselves.