Helping Others, Stinginess, and the Misunderstood Line Between Prudence and Entitlement
Helping others is one of the noblest things a human can do. Whether it's giving money, time, food, or even advice, the act of reaching out to support someone in need carries great value. The Bible also encourages us to help those in need, stating that the hand that gives will never lack. However, as beautiful as giving is, many people misunderstand it. One major confusion lies in the line between stinginess and prudence.
Some people are labelled stingy simply because they don’t give as openly as others. But the truth is, being careful with money doesn’t mean someone is selfish. This is what we call being prudent that's managing one’s resources wisely to avoid waste. A prudent person may choose not to spend carelessly because they are planning for the future, supporting hidden responsibilities, or trying to stay financially stable. However, society often sees them as stingy because they are not given as freely as expected.
Another issue is that many people give with the mindset of getting something in return. That kind of giving is not genuine; it’s more of a transaction. True help comes with no strings attached. For example, if someone gives you money because they believe you will repay it or reward them later, it is not real charity. It’s an investment. A lot of people help, not from a place of love, but from the hope of future benefit. Real giving should not expect repayment.
A bigger challenge is when people develop what is known as an “entitlement mentality.” This means they believe others owe them help or support, even when they have done nothing to earn it. They feel that because someone helped them in the past or has more money now, they are forever required to give. This mindset creates problems. It puts unnecessary pressure on givers and causes bitterness when expectations are not met.
Take, for instance, the story of a young boy who lost both parents and had to work as a cleaner in a hospital. A kind-hearted doctor took him in, helped with his schooling, and supported him until he graduated. While her help was significant, she later began demanding constant service from the boy, now a grown man with responsibilities. She expected him to continue serving her, not as a form of appreciation, but almost as a duty. This crosses the line from giving to controlling. Others who helped the boy never asked for anything in return.
Society also plays a role in this. People who give are celebrated, but when they stop, they are judged. Givers are expected to always be available, and those who manage their money wisely are called stingy. Our society must learn to respect boundaries and understand that giving should be free-willed, not forced or expected.