Have Your Cake
It is my wife's birthday coming up in a few days, and Smallsteps and I have decided to "surprise" her with a small trip away together. It isn't actually a surprise for my wife, but Smallsteps and I have been planning it as if it is, and we will spend a few days in Tallinn Estonia next month. Smallsteps is very excited about keeping this secret, and while it is already booked (by my wife and I), she and I have sat down doing secret squirrel work looking at boat trips and hotels. It'll only be for a couple nights, but I am looking forward to it.
However, next week is also Vappu (May Day), which is the anniversary of when I asked my wife to marry me, a decade ago. We had already living together for a year or two, but I knew the night I met her that I was going to marry her. This also means that next year will be our tenth wedding anniversary as well, so I guess the occasion should be marked somehow.
The gift is tin?
That should keep costs down at least.
It is unlikely that we will be travelling anywhere too far this summer, so the short trip away will be nice, and Smallsteps has never been to Estonia. It is funny in Europe to me, because "going to another country" isn't such a big, because there are so many so close. From Australia though when I was a kid, travelling to another state was an event. My first trip to another country was to New Zealand on a school ski trip, and I was seventeen. Since then, I have travelled a lot more though, and while it is nice to get away, just "being away" isn't enough - it has to bring with it something special to do, or some good stories to tell.
Good stories don't happen sitting at a hotel pool.
We are looking to do a few domestic road trips this summer however, and visit some places we haven't been before, or to the coast to spend some time by the sea. Even though there are a couple hundred thousand lakes, I miss the being close to the ocean, and we live inland. There are lots of little random bits of nature to see, or the odd tourist attraction, and we will probably do some AirBnB stays instead of hotels to keep the costs down.
Part of my approach to building a new lifestyle, is spending more time doing more normal things, rather than just working. I haven't travelled that much in Finland largely because I just haven't taken the time for it, often using the excuse that I have better things to spend the money on than random trips. However, while they might not be filled with the same kind of exciting experiences as the past, Smallsteps is also at an age where she is going to start benefiting from these experiences too.
A lot of people don't like driving distance with their kids, I actually love it, as we always have great conversations. The other day, I was out with Smallsteps and when we had almost got home, she asked if we can drive for a bit longer and talk more, so we just went around side streets and things for another quarter hour chatting.
Normal things.
Eat better. Exercise consistently. Spend quality time with friends and family. Enjoy the little things a little more. While I spend a lot of time considering the larger meta environment in which I live, it is also important to act locally, and part of that is ensuring that I am taking care of myself, as well as others in some way.
Since Smallsteps was born, we have put so much time, money and energy into providing for her needs, that at least for me, I have largely forgotten about myself, and that isn't good for her either. It looks like we will never be free of health issues in this family, but if we keep waiting that we are all okay before we do things, we will be waiting forever, doing nothing in the meantime.
Can do attitude.
This phrase is often used to describe someone who has a positive mindset and takes a proactive approach to situations to get things done. But for me, maybe it is more do what I can even if it isn't quite what I want. Doing something is better than doing nothing when it comes to quality of life.
Which reminds me...
Even though we have the short trip booked for the birthday, I think I am going to have to get something to mark the actual day also. It doesn't have to be (won't be) expensive, but I think that getting something on your birthday is mandatory - at least to go with the card that Smallsteps is going to make. I have been looking around for a yoga mat carry bag - and there are apparently none in Finland in any store, anywhere, and it is too late to get one online. So I will have to look for something else.
Small things.
Perhaps a hug voucher.
Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]
My daughter Sofia's mother (separated) went crazy when I gave her a beautiful bouquet of flowers, whether there was a reason for it or not. A few carnations at the foot of the bed would be a nice present.
Oh, I do that already. A few weeks ago I bought a nice orchid for her. :)
Must be nice. I am at some stage in life when there will be no flight trips for a while (baby coming) end of the year) and then probably only local - I will learn more about England. still, i am excited for the next 2 years.
Try a mystery gift with like 10-12 hints/notes sending you from one part to another until you find the final gift, anticipation building is quite exciting.
Congrats on the coming new adventure!
I wish we were able to have a second, but it wasn't to be.
I feel that those hints would just lead to me being naked, and her being disappointed.
Having you and her daughter would be a perfect present. How much more when she could receive your surprise? She would be the happiest. My good wishes for your upcoming trip. 🫶
Birthdays for me are special because celebrating them is synonymous with the love that two people had to bring you into the world.
In my case, I try not to let any of these dates go without a celebration.
At home it is a tradition that on the day of one's birthday we all wait until 12 o'clock at night to give him his present and start his birthday.
Now my wife and I live there and we keep the tradition.
Her birthday was April 11 and we went to a hotel for three days, which is what she enjoys.
As for what you say about driving a long time to engage in conversation with the kids I am fine with that because for that anything is a good reason.
Congratulations to your wife and to both of you on your 10th anniversary. Happy day. Cheers and best regards.
It seems like a great gift to be traveling on your birthday with the people you love most in the world. It's a great gift that is priceless.
I hope it is a nice trip at least. There are always little hassles when traveling, but maybe this one will be pretty smooth :)
That sounds like a wonderful trip you have planned. I agree with you on needing to get out and doing things. My wife and I will likely be doing more of that on our camping trips now. We used to take our dog but she didn't do well being left alone, so we usually just sat around the campsite. Which was relaxing and enjoyable in its own way. I hope you guys have a wonderful time. Rentals must be different over there. I haven't found them to be much different in price than hotels over here.
I would love to go camping, or at least try it. Will have to find a friend who has some equipment though, or else we have to buy everything.
The rentals are cheaper here normally, but more importantly, they have a kitchen, so that we don't have to rely on what is around to consider allergies etc.
That is a good point about the kitchen. My wife and I are planning for a longer trip this summer (without out trailer) and we are trying to figure out how we can avoid eating out every meal. Camping can get a bit crazy with all the gear. Your best bet is finding a tent and just setting it up in the backyard for a night to see if you can even handle that part of it. If that doesn't go well the last thing you want to do is try it out in the middle of nowhere!
I think it is great that you are including your daughter in the planning. Not only will it be good training, but you are sure to visit places that she would like. I think trying to keep it a 'surprise' for your wife is nice and fun. I hope you enjoy your trip.
I have a hotel picked out that has a pool in it, so that way she will be more than content and perhaps won't mind all the walking :D
Dear my bro @tarazkp !
I have assumed that you have made great sacrifices for your family!
Perhaps your health is the happiest gift to your family!
I hope she's happy with her birthday gift you'll be giving her in a few days!!
If my health is the gift, it is a pretty crappy gift! :D
Looks like you got a new bro.
In a world where I’m surrounded with failed family relationships, this gives me hope that an amazing relationship is still feasible.
I’m certain she will appreciate anything you gift her, it’s the thought that counts.
If you are surrounded by failed relationships - make sure you spend extra time learning to build a healthy one.
This period is a period of celebration for your family. From your wife’s birthday, to the celebration of when she accepted your proposal and down to your wedding anniversary. I hope you both and Smallsteps have a nice time and enjoy the trip
We have two periods of celebration in the year - this one and then the Anniversary and Smallsteps birthday in August. My birthday seem not to get celebrated too much :D
After experiencing an almost-death experience, this really made me realize how important each moment can be. I really learned that special moments don't necessarily need to be perfect and ideal; rather, special moments can be something I do every day. That's why, for me, it's really important to enjoy everything so that I'll have no regrets in the end.
What kind of near death experience did you have? I have had a few, so it is always interesting to hear :)
Glad you are okay!
Thanks @tarazkp, so to answer your question, it was way back before I was formally diagnosed with lupus. I really thought I was going to die at that time because the number of my cells was alarmingly decreasing. My body was extremely weakened at that time, and I even reached the point where half of it became paralyzed. I'm slowly losing hope because we're really unaware of what's really happening in my body. I even got to the point that I don't want to eat anymore, but luckily my family is there to force me to eat. Fortunately, after almost a month of hospitalization, I was able to gradually regain my health. Now, although I'm not really fully healed from it because it's a chronic disease with no cure, I can manage its effects on my body with my medicines. That's why I'm really grateful and happy that I'm still alive and was given another chance to experience living.
Wow, you share little out of your love life story. That could boost other people's relationship. Wishing your wife a happy birthday to come
me: ...Talinn Estonia, why does that sound so familiar? [checks notes] oh I had it as a setting for one of the games that false started XD and also the whole country is a setting for some events in the codiverse XD which was partially based off this weird dream I had ages ago where I simultaneously opened a portal to Estonia and watched me (as someone else) open said portal to Estonia (and up til that point when I looked it up out of curiousity I didn't realise Estonia was an actual place).
Only took you a few years to finally start doing the things the comment section has been yelling at you about ;D
Good luck finding a cool birthday present. Maybe order the yoga mat bag anyway and apologise for it being late XD
Lols - some people know Estonia as the place that Encino man is from - Stony from Estonia :D
I know I know...
City of Tallinn sounds a wonderful historical place to explore, sea with pristine beaches to enjoy an ice-cream cone.
Enjoy planning as much as I know you will enjoy the visit being together, short holidays makes a massive impact on our well being.
I think it might be too cold for the beaches, but maybe if the weather holds, an ice cream in old town will be possible. If it goes well, we could do another short trip there in the summer, when it is warmer - maybe even take the car (on the ferry) and drive a bit.
Sometimes it's good to go without too many plans, let the sticks fall as you all feel on the day.
Taking small trips is always a pleasure, however I also don't find traveling with children that unpleasant, we with my stepdaughter and some of her friends have taken various trips by car and they were fun, the children always find games to play to pass the time time, however I see that you have excellent objectives, also because as it says here you have to work to live and not live to work even if sometimes you can't do otherwise. As far as Europe is concerned, the beauty of it is that you can change various nations because they are all close.