Navigating Life's Unwritten Rules
It really doesn't get easier when we grow older and face the complexities of adult life.
There's an element of deconstruction from childhood dreams and expectations as we face the reality of a world that doesn't conform to our idealized visions.
For me, it's quite an irony that the fairy tales and simplified narratives I was raised on began to unravel in the face of nuance, contradiction, and harsh truths.
I mean, to understand nothing is given or taken freely is also to understand that freedom is a constant negotiation between our desires and constraints.
The freedom we seek exists within boundaries we didn't create but must acknowledge and this realization can be both liberating and terrifying.
Against that backdrop, you'll also realize that there are unwritten rules of the game and unless you're aware and "live by" those rules, you risk getting left behind or outmaneuvered.
Society operates on implicit agreements, tacit knowledge that isn't taught in schools but is essential for navigating professional spaces, relationships, and even self-development.
For example, those who truly succeed in life tend to understand these implicit social contracts. Like sensing the shifting winds of opportunity and timing that others miss entirely or knowing which battles to fight and which to surrender.
Insufficient Awareness
I'm not sure if it's an art, a skill or plain luck, but society as a layer is a complex game with constantly shifting rules.
Awareness itself is increasingly becoming a rare and valuable currency, in my mind.
In an age of information overload, the ability to perceive what matters—to separate signal from noise—becomes a key advantage to possess.
But paradoxically, this awareness can be a burden as much as a blessing.
Just because I'm unaware of certain power dynamics or social structures doesn't make that reality less important or meaningful from an objective point of view.
My ignorance doesn't negate truth, it merely blinds me to it and the gravity of unseen forces shapes our lives whether we acknowledge them or not. Sometimes, even more that the seen forces we acknowledge.
On the other hand, being aware of these hidden frameworks only slightly improves our chances without guaranteeing success.
Of course, I'm gradually developing my probabilistic thinking mindset. The point is awareness is necessary but insufficient. Knowledge without action or wisdom is merely trivia, interesting sure, but ultimately impotent.
Bias To Action
Now, increasing awareness reveals more complexity, which demands even greater awareness.
This is akin to the paradox of knowledge - the more we learn, the more we realize how much we don't know.
And we more or less find ourselves on an endless treadmill of understanding, always one step behind the evolving reality we're trying to grasp.
In my view, it isn't that different from other endless treadmills that society has created for us, such as the rat race and the pursuit of status or material wealth.
The difference is that this one is internal, not external.
Humble vigilance could well serve as a potential antidote to this overwhelming complexity, as in remaining alert to the unwritten rules while acknowledging we'll never fully master them.
Granted, this is a more realistic approach and in practice is basically balancing the awareness of different moving parts with the grace to act despite having incomplete information.
Dare I say, this could also be a path to cultivate meta-awareness: an understanding of the limits of the understanding. Or a willingness to be both student and player in a game whose full rulebook we'll never read.
Of course, also understanding those who insist on knowing all the rules before playing never get to play at all. Bias towards taking action, can be a wise choice in that regard.
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