Diary of Exhaustion

The mall, the market or anywhere designed for shopping, is usually one place where my minimalist journey is tested to the fullest. In these places, everything on display seems to know your name, calling to you in silent whispers. At the end of the day, you respond to their calls, purchase so many items you simply could have admired, then get home excited to have bought them.

This excitement is short lived though, because few days after, you discover that there isn’t really much use for that item. You wear it to an event, receive a lot of compliments, but stay uncomfortable for the entirety of the event. This makes you reluctant to wear it at times where you were supposed to. Clutter finds its way into your life. You bought it because you liked it, but can’t use it because it’s either too selective, or purely uncomfortable, and you wouldn’t want to throw it away because of the money spent. This is something I’ve experienced a lot of times.

I went to the market today, to get myself some items I’ve been wanting. I love getting things for myself and since I’d been planning this for a while now, I looked forward to the market experience. Going from one store to the other, walking past sellers shouting at passersby for visibility, having to continuously make choices you won’t end up regretting, it can be so exhausting, and that’s why I sometimes dread shopping at the market.

Anyways, I made a purchase, and had to wait for the item to be tailored to my taste. An opportunity to pause and take a step away from the shebang going on around me. Life at the market sometimes. seems like a ritual, because everyone is either looking for something, or they’re busy bustling around in need of something. It’s always a hub of activities, with everyone doing everything. As excited as I am, to get new items, just thinking of the rowdy environment, can leave me drained.

However, I stayed, analyzing life around me. Utilizing this opportunity to not have to make choices but rather be a spectator of other people’s actions. The market has a different life of its own, crammed with people who are always in a hurry to move from one store to the other, sellers who are desperate to have their wares sold before the day runs-out. It’s a never-ending rush. I realized this as I waited for my item to be ready.

At the market, we are blinded by our bid to find the right pieces. At the market, every thing that can be bought with money, glares at us, filling us with waves of foreign wants. Surrounded by needs, wants, and simply appealing items, there’s always the need for a pause, the need for a rethink. The need for time that isn’t spent deciding whether items are worth it or not. I simply watched people admire items, haggle prices, and arrange goods. While everyone did what they did, I watched them. At that moment, nothing was expected of me but to be. I didn’t need to do anything but watch. It was refreshing to be honest.

After about two hours of sellers imposing their choices on me, to choose between the most suitable bags, jewelries that fit, hairs that suit me best, I finally had the chance to breathe and not feel like there’s something I should be considering before making a purchase. I finally got to reconnect with myself right there and then.

One of the reasons why I’m happy with my minimalist decision, is the fact that simple moments now seem to have such big impacts. Something as simple as people-watching now leaves me refreshed and ready to take on the next chapter of my day. The #slow-living Sunday is an opportunity to share bits and pieces of my day. Safe to say, I had a very exhausting day but these few moments, of blending in my environment, kept me going for the entirety of my stressful adventure.

Thanks for reading.

Images are mine.

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