Present but Absent: Phones and Family Time

As important as the phone is to you and me, I have noticed how much we are connected to it. No doubt, it's a useful tool, assisting humans daily in our activities. It's also amazing how it entertains us all the time, and most of its usefulness at times puts a barrier to the way we ought to socialize and connect more physically with our family members.

I have also noticed that at times, everyone in my home would be seated in the same living room and yet completely absent. Why? Because of the use of phone. It happens sometimes; our bodies will just be there but not the mind. Phones get everyone busy in different corners, chatting and smiling all alone even when it was supposed to be strictly family time.

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At times, we get seated at the dining table, and while food is glaring at us, some heads are bent towards their phones, scrolling through Facebook feeds or comedy videos. Sometimes, food gets cold even before it gets consumed. What a habit! The use of a phone makes some people lose appetite even, from one scroll to another, and it keeps going that way, and we get lost until someone calls back your spirit to attend to your food at the dining. It's that bad.

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If I say I am never a victim, then I am lying. Even my husband complains sometimes, but yet he finds himself doing the same things once in a while. The kids too get stuck with video games and abandon their food at the dining table until action is taken. I think it also happened on day when we decided to see a particular movie as a family. Not long into the movie,phone started distracting us. It's a habit that resurface once in a while though not always but I had once considered phone ban during important hour with my family and I but never go strict on it if I should be sincere, and that's why the habit keep occuring at some point and it's never healthy,maybe being strict might not even solve the issue but leaving by examples.

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Family time should come with NO divided attention if we desire to have a quality one. The use of phones during important family time is a big distraction; most conversation is forced, and we miss the moment, just like that. However, if it's for something very important and urgent, one can still use a phone briefly but not to the point of interfering with family time.

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For this prompt, the big question is, should we consider banning phones in our homes during a specific time of the day, like during dinner or when the family gathers to see a movie, knowing how families can connect better without phone distractions? Again, will it be an infringement of rights?

One thing I am certain of is that a simple rule, and an intentional one at that, can change an old experience and bring more laughter, fill every vacuum, and make everyone feel alright and happier, bonding more healthily. A simple rule like no use of phone during a family meal or movie is harmless. Depending on what I want for my family, I might really impose a ban or just make the rule, practice it myself, and expect others to follow suit.

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Indeed, everyone should have a right to their phones, but that right shouldn't override intentional family bonding. Rules are just boundaries in my own perspective, just like I set screen time for my kids and expect them to abide by it...banning the use of phones for 20 to 30 minutes during an important time with my family isn't a biggy at all, but where everyone becomes intentional with the use of phones, a ban might not even be needed; otherwise, we should do the needful and reclaim our quality family time together.

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This post is in response to the #Hive Learners community prompt on the topic titled Phone Ban

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