Tradition Should Not Bankrupt Love

Today, I happen to have time to hop on a 3 hours long call with a very old friend of mine. It’s been years we actually met but anytime we speak, it feels like nothing has changed at all.This is actually the kind of vibe I love to have around me.

Somewhere in our discussion, we happen to talk about a friend of ours who was getting married today but due to our schedules, we couldn’t be there. This got us laughing a lot about how people always go on about how there’s no money but end up getting married every weekend. Honestly, I just can’t seem to wrap my head around it. I mean, we all want to marry and look forward to it. But if I’m to be honest, marriage has been made to look like a money laundering scheme because tell me why you have to go in for a loan just to get married.

I mean, we aren’t getting married to be in debt but rather to build a good life with our partner. I don’t know about you , but in my part of the world, people literally spend all their lives savings and some more on getting married to the love of their lives. This to me is insane. Where I come from, you’d see most young men between the ages for 24-45 being single because they really don’t have the money people expect them to have to be able to throw a lavish wedding.

The system itself is not working in our favor, so imaging having to work your whole life just to throw a billion dollar wedding for your wife, end up in debt after the wedding and with little to no money whatsoever. All for what? To please people? No one really cares in case you didn’t get the money. To another extent, I wouldn’t entirely blame the lady but also the family you come from or the one you’re marrying into. You see, what family cannot push you to do does not exist. If you don’t have some level of self discipline, you would always find yourself being pushed around by your family or your partners when it comes to matters about your marriage.

I was telling my friend how I think that it’s very important to let both families understand that you’re getting married because you want a life together. Have a budget, present it to your families and make sure to work diligently around it. You don’t need a big wedding, you only need a wedding with blessing’s and love. No need to host the whole country, if your budget can only accommodate 50-70 people, go for it. Marry into happiness, not into debt and problems all around.
Also, as families, let’s try to go easy on our brothers, sisters and children who hope to marry anytime soon. Let’s make things easier for them and not worse.

all images belong to me.