Parenting in the Age of Boundaries: Kids and Their Right to Privacy

There’s no denying the every parent is overprotective when it comes to their kids, but in a good way though. And with this overprotectiveness comes the habit of being very nosy. As someone who grew up in an African home, I’ve had my own fair share of nosiness.

Back story- one time about around 15 years of age, I kept a dairy which had a lot of things in it. You know how teens can be. I hid it in my wardrobe which as obviously in my room and it wasn’t just lying in my wardrobe, it was hidden behind a pile of clothes. One day, I came back from school to find my mom and dad reading it and laughing. I wasn’t pissed because they already knew ablkt these stuff. You can imagine the betrayal.😂

Back to the topic. I grew up in a home where everyone was open. We barely closed our door and till date, I mostly prefer to open my door when I’m at home unless maybe when I need some peace of mind or privacy. We didn’t have an open door policy when I was growing up because we were trained to not hide anything from our patents. This way, our parents trusted that we will open up to them and they also respect our privacy up till today. But us leaving our doors open most of the time became a thing because we always banged our doors which left my dad with a headache.😂

Privacy is very important in the lives of everyone, both old and young and as much as people may not say it, we all desire to have some level of privacy no matter the situation. Even married couples who live together and do everything together need their privacy. It’s just a human thing a guess. I don’t have kids yet but I do have a family with younger siblings whom I’m protective of. And as much as I want the best for them, I let them know that I respect their privacy with my actions. I do look through their stuff sometimes just like my mom used to do when I was much younger thinking I wouldn’t know.😂 But as I said, it’s all out of love.

It’s okay to be nosy and all as a parent but there should some boundaries to it. You don’t have to make it look like you’re policing your kids as that would make them feel insecure and uncomfortable. You have to involve them and make it more comfortable for them. At some stage, when kids STC much older, parents just quit being nosy because then, they know that we are mature and know what is right and wrong. I guess it’s a parent something.

At the end of the day, we all need to understand that being a parent isn’t as easy as it looks. Having to take care of yourself while also caring and looking out for others isn’t an easy task. So, let’s try to be more understanding with our parents and parents should also make it a point to be available for their kids and provide them with a safe space at all times. This way, there would really be no need for policing.

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all images belong to me.

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