Expectations That Forget We’re Human

Life is long but short journey of learning, unlearning and relearning to attain growth. Since I was born, I have grown to learn the ways of life, how thing should be done in every situation and also how to handle myself and be a better person for myself and also those around me.

I vividly remember those times I was still a child. Then, I was an only child and my parents weren’t quite old. My dad has his own business, and my mom same. We lived in our family house with my grandparents and other aunties and uncles. Then, my dad wasn’t that old, but he was stable. I still remember him going away for a while and coming back to spend sometime until it all stopped. I asked my mom and she told me he was doing his phd or something like that at that time. Basically, he was furthering his education while building a life for himself.

Fast forward, he was done with schooling and even then, he already has a well paying job and other business which weren’t bringing us money. We weren’t rich, but we were okay. Through this, my dad managed to build his own house and also developed himself in diverse ways. This isn’t to brag about my family but rather to cast an eye back to what was, then and what is now. Just a few days ago, I was telling a friend of mine that in as much as our parents didn’t have it easy in their time, the system was working fine as compared to our current situation.

I’m over twenty years now and I have nothing to my name, don’t know where I’m headed but still pushing forward. My story is the same for the average Ghanaian youth today. In Ghana, I’d like to believe people still think things are as easy as the used to be. At 20 years or above, you’re expected to be done with the university, have a well paying job (which is even non existent in our country today unless you know someone), probably get married, have kids, your own house and even a car. We are expected to attain all these in a country where the system works for only those in power.

This unrealistic standard has led to most of our youth today engaging in prostitution labelled as hookup, internet fraud repackaged into online work and many more things you can imagine. I know people , ladies whose mothers tell them to go and stay with their boyfriends just so they can get some money to feed. I’ve equally seen boys who engage in fraud, build houses for their parents and they praise them. Sadly, everyone wants to win whether is true legal or illegal means.

No one wants to work hard today because even those who work smart and hard are struggling talk less of the lazy ones. And to even think that young ladies are still being pressured to marry in todays age is mind blowing. I’ve had people ask me what I’m waiting for and that my friends are getting married and I’m claiming empowered woman and blah blah blah. It’s like we just wake up and pick men from the street to get married to. Our dear brothers aren’t also left out. In a world where the girl child is being empowered, our boy children are left to fight for themselves sometimes. Yet, they are also required to be responsible for families they didn’t start.

Once a guy hits 20, trust me that his mostly and always depressed due to unrealistic standards set by society for him. It is really our fault that things aren’t the same anymore and we can’t have all these things now even though we are trying so much. To me, as an African child, my mates in other parts of the world have a head start over me because they have systems in place to get to the wherever they want to. At the end of the day, life really isn’t a race. Let’s not kill ourselves because others want us to be what they think we have to be. Be you!

all images belong to me.