Unfairly Judged
Is there anything like a good stereotype, or am I that bad? I mean, most of the time I've been judged because of my affiliations or appearance, the assumptions have always been way off the mark. At first, it used to annoy me, but as I matured, I realized people make assumptions about others based on what they've experienced, heard, or seen from people with similar features or tribe. I have also made assumptions about others even before talking to them, too. So I'm not completely a saint of the sometimes annoying act.
Over the years, I've had numerous experiences of being unfairly judged that it will take a long time to discuss. However, some experience just never goes away, probably because of how embarrassing or deeply conflicting it was at the time they happened. Even till now, whenever I think of those happenings, I'm still engulfed in anger or sadness, like, why would anyone imagine this about me?
The first one that readily comes to mind happened in my first year in a higher institution. I resumed late for the first semester, so when I got to school, I was about playing catch-up. But my roommate was already there and had made some friends. In my first week, we went out together to one of his friends' places, and he introduced me as the new guy. We greeted and all, and that was when the shit happened.
One of the guys was like, "Dude, which state are you from?" Oblivious of what was about to hit me, I gave a sharp answer. The guys looked at themselves, looked right at me, and one of them said, "Wow, guy, so you also eat dogs like this. Omoh." Immediately, I heard that my countenance changed. Yes, a city in my state is famous for eating dogs but that doesn't mean the whole state eats dogs.
My overriding emotion was to return an aura for aura. I mean, I have heard terrible things about the states and tribes of these guys, too. I wanted to hit back and make them feel stupid. But then, I also saw an opportunity to educate a bunch of idiots. So I took my time to explain to them that it only happens in one town in the whole state and blablabla. After all my epistles, one still said, "So, you wan make us believe say you no dey chop dog now, abi? Omo, e go hard small o." Well, that's why they are idiots in the first place, right?
One stereotype that I've learnt to eventually ignore is the one I've endured the most. It had happened so much that I no longer care about it. And then, it's easy to ignore because I've seen it happen to a lot of people around me, too. I guess once you have a feature that's not a general assumption, it's instantly made about you. At first it did annoy me, but then I learnt that's the way of life, and I've done it to people too, so, fair game.
As for overcoming stereotypes, it takes a long time to do that. I once told an ex that girls from her town were known to be chronic cheats. I've heard that and have lived in the town for three years before and seen it too. So when she eventually pulled the stunt I wasn't surprised. Till this day, a lot of people still hold that ugly belief about them.
So, stereotypical beliefs rarely change. What I've learnt to do is to keep it in mind and use that assumption as a guide. Like, I'm being accused of this because some people before me who look or act like me did it. I will make sure not to do it to set an example.
