The WhatsApp Meeting That Finished Me

It was an unforgettable Monday at TK Wig Boss Luxury Hair. Every first Monday of the month, we usually hold a physical meeting to discuss business growth and challenges.

But this Monday was different — our boss scheduled an urgent online meeting by 10 a.m.

Trying to impress, I woke up early, got my dress ready, took my bath, and dressed more professionally than I have ever done. I didn’t know my village people had other plans.

I checked my phone — 10% battery!
“Heeeey!” I shouted.

I rushed out in my ironed shirt and black shoes, looking for where to charge. If you saw me that morning, you would think I had missed my way. But somehow, I succeeded.

At exactly 10 a.m., the meeting started. I connected to my hotspot and joined early. I was one of the first to join, and the seriousness on my face showed — I was nodding nonstop like a lizard in front of a mirror.

Anyone who knows me knows I’m best friends with catarrh. Without warning, I sneezed — loudly and uncontrollably — and the mucus ran out like I hadn’t blown my nose in decades. I didn’t realize I hadn’t muted my mic — and my camera was still on.

Instead of wiping it off quickly, I let it drip like a broken tap. It was my boss’s shout that reset my brain.

Source

That’s when I noticed everyone else had switched to audio. I swear, they were all laughing behind their screens.

“Mary,” my boss said, “do you know this is a meeting and not a playground? Get ready for what comes after.”

They gave me the floor to speak. I was just about to apologize when my network started misbehaving. The video froze. I rushed out, holding my phone high, searching for signal like my life depended on it.

Just as I was closing the gate behind me, I met a dog I can only describe as mad. It started barking and charging at me like I owed it money.

God saved me. I didn’t run — I froze. After seconds that felt like hours, I picked a stone. The dog saw reason and backed off.

I looked back at my screen — all I saw was "unstable connection... disconnected."

I quickly called a colleague to ask if I was the only one not connected.

She laughed and said, “Well done! You had to hear what madam said. You made our meeting this month unfruitful but hilarious. Sannu fa.”

The next day at work, everyone was mimicking me. I joined in the joke, but deep down, I was hiding my shame.

That WhatsApp meeting? It was the worst and most hilarious experience of my life.