My Struggle Overcoming the Fear of Donating
Growing up in an environment where giving wasn't in our bloodstream made donating seem like a taboo to me. In my childhood vicinity, donating anything—clothes, money, or whatever—was considered the easiest way of selling our destiny, and as a result, we dared not donate.
After I graduated from my elementary education, I relocated from that environment, but the mindset never left me. I was still so blindfolded with this ideology.
The new environment I found myself was a well-developed city, where people gave freely without expecting anything in return—an attitude that was like a storm to me. I didn't expect it, but it happened repetitively. However, the question remained: Did that good act change me?
Picture of me wearing the wig when it was still available
There is something I can't brag about having so much, but I have a quiet a fair number of it I can change on a daily basis as I want. That's wigs. I'm the kind of person who can't sit for hours to make my hair, so I prefer having wigs to save me the stress.
The wig,I have enjoyed it and got tired of using it though it's still nice
I had a neighbor next door who found it difficult to afford a good hair and mostly wore the same weave for many weeks. I was in a state of giving out two of my wigs to her for a change, but I never did. The fear of not knowing her too well, and the thought of what if she turns my kindness against me, made me adamant. The worst part is that I had small wigs packed that I had not worn for ages.
One day, a friend of mine sent me a link that read, "Please respondents, I'm trying to build a website design where clothes can be donated, and I need to conduct some research. Please kindly help me fill out this survey." I was so happy that there were options for me to express my points on why I can't donate clothes. After completing the survey, my friend gathered all her data and built the website.
One day, she invited me to come along with her to collect dresses from families that showed interest in donating physical items. We went, and I saw that there are people whose middle name should be "kind." I saw lots of valuable new items donated, and that was when I got an invisible pinch, indirectly telling me to compare my belongings to what I'm seeing and answer the question if their destinies have been taken.
That was when I turned to my friend who worked in a non-governmental organization with the core aim of providing for the needy. I told her I have some clothes I have not touched for months now that I intended to burn since I didn't have any siblings close to me to try them on. Since I knew her well and where she works, donating them would make an impact rather than using the other option.
Yeah, for the wig? You guessed right if you thought I included it in the clothes.
Now, for this wristwatch—this is another valuable gift I received this year. We exchanged gifts, and I got a masculine wristwatch. I'm yet to decide who to gift this to yet.
Did I feel guilty about not giving out the hair to my neighbor? There was no guilty feeling, though I felt bad but not guilty. Then, was that action mean being stingy? Nah, I just allowed my imagination to cloud my mind. Regardless, I can't really say I have adapted to that spirit of easy donating, but knowing I did it once filled my heart with so much joy, and I'm excited, and I know in no time, I will get used to doing more.