Friendship That Binds! / HPUD

Humans are social beings created not to be alone without having people to connect and interact with. Apart from having family members - parents, siblings and relatives, which of course we didn't chose but was an act of nature, one also need to have friends. Friends are like stars in the sky, they lighten up our lives, even in the darkest of times.

Although some people shy away from keeping friends due to the ugly experiences they might have had with them, but I tell you, having friend(s), good ones though, is a blessing. Good friends are hard to come by, so they say but I believe that a good person is sure to have good friends. Good begets good.

But what makes a good friend and what are the qualities of a good friend you may ask? Well I would say that everything good makes a good friend but it entirely depends on one's perspective of what good is.

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I am not one who makes friends so easily, no apologies for that, it's just who I am. I choose who I want to become my friend and before that I need to be sure that the person is actually worth having as a friend and will be willing to walk through the friendship journey with me, maybe to forever, which of course isn't going to be an easy one. I'm not perfect neither do I want a perfect person as a friend but there are core qualities or values that I would love my friends to have. Here are some of them;

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One Is Trustworthiness

Being trustworthy is a virtue which some people do not have. Trust is the bedrock of a good friendship because it establishes reliability, encourages honest communication between friends and strengthens cooperation.
I value this a lot and wouldn't want to be associated with anyone who lack it, even the littlest of it. What's the use of having a friend whom I can't trust and freely confide in for fear of having my secrets out in the open once I tell them. Some friends do not have respect for their friend's secrets, they tell it to whosever that cares to listen and that's very bad. This behavior usually arises with that one friend who has a friend that has another friend with other circle of friends and before you know it, your secret is trending in all social media platforms. Ha!, this can cause one emotional damage and depression if care is not taken. Like I said before, I'm not perfect but I always try to show trustworthiness in my dealings with friends because I know that it's key to maintaining a strong and lasting friendship.

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Another One Is Loyalty.

It is often said that dogs are man's best friends due to their commitment and unparalleled loyalty. The journey of life comes ups and downs, the good times and bad times so having someone who will stick by me through thick and thin, supporting me in tough times and celebrating my wins is what I desire in a friend because I'll do same for them.

My friend Ngozi, is one friend anyone will be lucky to have. This lady is one hell of an encourager, supporter and loyalist. I am truly blessed having her as my friend. I remember when I had accommodation problems, she told me to come stay with her for as long as I want until I'm able to get mine. Even when I got the job I'm doing now some years ago, I wanted declining because the pay was low but she encouraged me to take it saying that it has a potential for growth. Now her words are coming true and I'm enjoying it.

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Next Is Common Values

As individuals, we have different values, beliefs and interests, and we may not see eye to eye with anyone who tries to make us change them, that is understandable. But in friendship, it's good to have a friend whose own has a considerable alignment with yours, that is a level where you can share similar interests, values and other positive things which can help cement a strong bond between friends.
I'm all for positivity in friendship and wouldn't fail to cut ties with any friend who shows the opposite, that's if the person refuses to change after being told.

There's another lady whom I've been friends with for nineteen years now. Our friendship started way back in college days and till date we are still strong. What made me get close to her brilliance, seriousness with studies, high level of coordination and discipline, all which actually aligned with mine. As we began to move and study together, our scores improved. Infact we had to register at a private library so we wouldn't have to wait for when the school library is less crowded for us to study. It also gave us the opportunity to access other resource books that weren't in the school library.

But before this new friend, I had another one. At first she was all good, but after later on, I noticed a change in her behavior, she started being frivolous, misses classes, tests and would always want me to help sort them out. I talked to her on several occasions but she wouldn't listen. I had no other choice but to end it because her new way of life didn't align with mine.

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There Is Also Respect

Respect is a two way thing. One is having respect for oneself and the other is having respect for others. Both of these are what I look out for in a friend. Anyone lacking in self respect, not valuing themselves can never do so for others and that's a bad sign. The person may find it hard to value other's opinions decisions, feelings, rights and will even over step their boundaries without care of hurting the other. If you try calling them to order, you'll be damned by the reaction you get. I don't have time for drama and fight, so such individuals are off my radar for friend material, lol.

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Lastly Is Good Communication

What is friendship without good communication.

Communication is the oil that drives the friendship vehicle. - Luchyl.

I would love to have a friend whom I can talk openly and honestly with about my feelings, grievances and hurt caused him or her while having no fear of being judged, misunderstood or hurt the more. In the same vein, I'd want the person to let me know when I'm in the wrong so I can apologize because hiding such and probably holding a grudge while claiming to be in good terms isn't healthy for the friendship. Also about our wins, failures, shortcomings and ideas that will help us excel in our different fields. Infact just about anything, especially ladies talk, shey you get, hehehe.

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There's this saying that "even a mad person has friends", that's noted but a mad person isn't a friend material. Hope you understand? 😅

I've highlighted the key qualities that a friend should posses, so anyone who has these, and even more which I'm sure you know I believe is a friend material and should be appreciated because they aren't easy to find.

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My Participation In HPUD

We all know what day it is today, it's the #hpud as of course I wouldn't be missing out on this eventful day.
So I powered up my widow's mite which is 26 Hive, hehehe. Now I have a total of 1730 HP. I'm targeting 2,000 HP before the year runs out. I know my growth is progressing little by little, I know I'll get to the peak one day.
Happy Hive Power Up Day To You.

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Thank you for reading, hope to see you again...

This is day 1 post for #juneinleo.

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Still the #threadsaddict 😂

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