In the den of kidnappers

Getting kidnapped is a very traumatic event nobody will ever wish to experience in their life. I mean, just imagine having to spend time in the hands of gun-wielding strangers whose aim is to collect millions of money from your family (which they probably don't even have). But let's imagine for a second that I got kidnapped and the kidnappers eventually had to let me go after some time because I couldn't stop talking about a topic (or some topics). There are actually several topics I can talk about for hours without getting tired and I think I will just talk about some of them.

I would first start talking about my favourite animes, especially Naruto. I would start talking about it like this; so, I know you guys are familiar with Naruto, so who do you think is better; Naruto or Sasuke? I mean, I know Naruto is the star of the show but we can all agree that Sasuke's fight scenes are way cooler. The way he carries himself during a fight with so much confidence is just something else. But you know who is even cooler than Sasuke? His brother! Yes, I'm talking about Itachi, that guy always looks like everyone he is fighting is beneath him, too cool!

Who would even win in a fight between Naruto and Itachi? But hold on first, let's remove their big guns. Itachi without the Susanoo and Naruto without Kurama. Ok, that's actually a big disadvantage to Naruto, how about we remove Itachi's Sharingan as well? Yeah, I think that's a better playing field, it reminds me of Naruto vs Sasuke's fight after the great war, even though Sasuke still uses his Sharingan. At this point, I will switch the topic to my favourite thing right now; computers and AI.

I will start like so; Have you guys heard the latest on AI? No, AI is not someone's name, it's artificial intelligence which is a subset of advanced analytics and data science. I believe y'all must have heard of chatGPT, no? Hmmm, it's everywhere now, y'all don't have smartphones? There's a fear now that AI will soon take over the jobs of humans, what do you all think about that? I mean, can you imagine AI taking over your business? Just going around kidnapping people. I wonder what they will ask for as ransom, it's not like they will need money for anything or maybe they won't be acting on their own, just another tool used by humans.

Anyway, have you wondered how AI is made? They are made with a combination of computer programming, algorithms and deep learning. Computer programming is actually a way of giving instructions to a computer to perform specific tasks. Do you know computers are actually stupid? So you don't know? Without humans, they can't do anything and you even have to tell it exactly what to do or else it will do the wrong thing! They are not like humans that can assume and figure things out on their own, they can be very stupid!

Programming is actually kind of sweet, although it can be incredibly boring as well if you're not passionate about it. Do you know that in programming, we start counting from 0? If you tell a child to count the number of people in this van now, they will say 1-2-3 but in programming, we say 0-1-2, crazy right? I guess it's that way because computer memories make use of the binary system (0 and 1), which is why the number 10 is represented as 1010 in a computer's memory, so it makes sense to start counting from 0.

If they are not already bored out of their brains by now, then I will start talking about fish, which I will begin like; Do you know eat catfish? Many people don't because of how slimy they are, especially when you boil them like in pepper soup, but I actually enjoy eating them. Do you know their scientific name? The most common one we see everywhere is Clarias gariepinus, but we also have very big ones which we call Heterobranchus bidorsalis and Heterobranchus longifililis, do you know the difference between them? I will give you a hint, it lies in their dorsal fins.

I believe at this point they might have thrown me out of their vehicle for almost driving them insane with these boring topics 😂 Many people would've cracked by the time I started talking about computers and programming stuff, it's an incredibly boring field. But, how do I come to know about all these things? Well, I watched a lot of anime (especially Naruto) while growing up and also played tons of video games about it (on PSP and laptop). As for computers, that's my current field and right now I'm a programmer who has taken a couple of computer science courses online.

As for fish, that's actually what I studied in the university (Aquaculture and Fisheries Management) and we focused mostly on catfish, considering it's the most cultivated fish species in Nigeria. I picked those topics because they are incredibly boring to a lot of people and if I had to pick a topic (or topics) that is guaranteed to get me abandoned by my kidnappers, then I certainly can't go wrong with those options or even one of them, especially computers and programming.

Thanks for reading

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