Simply me
It is astonishing how quickly people are to reach a conclusion about someone else. And I think most people do it. I do it sometimes. I can look at a person and start assuming different things the person could be. You can just walk into a room to sit quietly and somehow, you've been labelled proud, serious or unfriendly. It has happened to some of the people around me, and I have also experience it myself.
People often think that I am quiet, overly serious, proud or sometimes aloof. Some think I'm mean simply because I don't go around with smiles plastered on my face. I have heard people say this to me more times than one and I don't even blame them. I can only imagine that from the outside, I, somehow, appear to be that kind of person. So it is easy to assume that I am either acting big or that I just don't want to engage.
This is hardly true though. Being careful with who I get close to, is just what I do. I don't understaṅd the point of small talks or trying to connect with anyone I'm not interested in connecting with. I would rather just sit in silence in my own space, but even this can be seen as me being arrogant or prideful. They assume I feel too big or look down on others just because I'm reserved.
People gets uncomfortable when they can't figure you out and not everyone can understand that a person can just sit in a corner and mind their business without wanting to be involved in every single conversation. But this is absolutely normal to me.
My roommates in my first year at the university will always be my favourite. We got along so well and I talked more. But every other year after that was different. I didn't dislike any of them, nor did I like them, so I just existed, and "she's very proud" became my moniker.
There are people who often think that being quiet automatically means you are either sad, angry or proud. Most times that is not the case at all. Some of us just feel most relaxed when we are away from company, or we talk only when we want to or have something to add. But if it is someone I am actually cool with or someone I wish to be friends with, I am very different with them. I talk more, smile and usually in a much better mood. I just need to want to talk to you. It isn't pride but preference.
Something that I have come to realise is that people's assumptions or beliefs say more about themselves than they do about me. While some might generally think that silence indicate shyness or arrogance, it is simply peace to me. Not everyone deserves access to your energy and everyone is entitled to think whatever they like. But if someone really makes an effort to know me, they often find that I'm not proud or mean. I'm simply just reserved until I feel safe enough to open up.
Some people may think that I am quiet, overly serious or even proud, and it's actually okay. I am simply someone that smiles when I actually mean it, laughs when there is something is to laugh about, stay quiet when there is nothing to say and selects my friends carefully.
Thanks for reading...
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