FACTORS TO CONSIDER

When it comes to parenting, I have observed that it is not as straightforward as we want it to be. As much as we want everything to go in a certain way, we need to consider that there are a lot of important factors that bring out the behavioral pattern in every human. Upbringing is a major factor to consider here. Train a lion with goats and it will behave like one, and this is just the natural order of life. But while training is important, a lot of parents do not know how to train (myself included.) Although I am not yet one, I have those I am responsible for and I see that it is more than just telling people what to do , or showing them how to do it. It is more than just yelling or shouting whenever they go wrong, and it is more than just correcting in love. The fact that even though you are responsible for someone and are not with them 24/7 and can not relate with everything they do because you are the mature one changes a lot of variables that determine how a child turns out to be.

Photo by Lawrence Crayton on Unsplash

From my little understanding of parenting, I think there needs to be a balance between what you want from the child and what they want out of life. A wayward child doesn't become wayward all of a sudden, it begins with the environment, and peers which influences the child’s decision on what they want to be. If a footballer's son hangs around basketballers a lot but trains with his father in football, chances are that the child would unexpectedly have more interest in basketball. Then the father would ask why basketball? Maybe also ask, “Am I not enough for you”. But at that point it is the child craving to achieve something beyond his reach. Born into the world of football, but associated with basketballers. He might not even be as good in Basketball as he is in football, but for the fact that he feels it is a challenge, he would only be interested in conquering it.

This example I just gave is a major issue between kids and their parents. I experienced it too and it made me realize that parents need to be more attentive to a behavioural pattern of their child, and not assume that the child is following them. For example if the footballer father had noticed when the son goes on his own to basketball courts, or watches basketball in his free time, he might have understood the interest from the beginning. This simply means that behaviors are mostly formed and not inherited. Being born of a lion doesn’t mean the cub will grow to be one, especially if it grows around goats. It might look like a lion, might even sound like one, but it will never be one. It;s a natural order of life and no matter how we try to ignore it, we have all become the way we are (as adults) because we learned certain things at certain periods of our lives with so many factors affecting us.

THIS IS MY RESPONSE TO HIVE LEARNER'S
PROMPT FOR WEEK 190 EPISODE 3