A Reflection Of Reality: A Review Of “Distant View Of A Minaret”

Marriage is a complex topic that only those who are in it can fully understand and explain. Yet, I keep coming across prompts, discussions, heated arguments, and recently, books that prompt me to share my take on it. Over the years, writers, both male and female, have used their works to explore the complexities of marriage, employing settings, characters, dialogue, and themes. From insecurity and trust issues to communication breakdowns, financial stress, infertility, physical and emotional abuse, infidelity, and so on. Contemporary writers continue to use their works to explore these themes. In this post, I'll review Distant View of a Minaret, a collection of short stories by Alifa Rifaat. The anthology is loaded with fifteen short stories. Of all the short stories in the collection, Distant View of a Minaret resonates deeply with me.

I grew up in a pretty average family. Of course, every family faces struggles in their marriage from time to time, and mine was no exception. My parents often tried to keep their disagreements hidden from us children. Sometimes they succeeded, but other times their emotions got the better of them. However, in my neighborhood, there was a couple who fought almost every day. They battled with words, and sometimes physically. And whenever their fights got heated, their kids - a girl and a boy - would come to our house to sleep. Most times, the wife would end up with bruises all over her face. As a child, I didn't think too deeply about their family struggles. But as I grew older, I began to think about the psychological damage the parents must have inflicted on the children, and also about how much the woman suffered. Physical and emotional abuse is common in marriages, growing up, I witnessed how far it can damage homes.

Another issue that is common in marriages is infidelity and physical and emotional disconnection. Oftentimes, infidelity leads to emotional and physical disconnection. For example, after being married for 10 years, a man starts to cheat on his wife with a younger woman- spending his money and time with his young mistress. His wife who was once “the beautiful flower” and “rare gem” will suddenly become withered and lost. This will in turn cut all emotional and physical attraction he once had for his wife. This is the issue Alifa Rifaat explores in her work, Distant View of a Minaret.

The short story explores the themes of marriage, intimacy, and emotional disconnection. The story opens with an unnamed couple. The wife lies in bed with her husband, feeling disconnected from him. Although they are right beside each other, it seems like they are in two different worlds. Your partner should be your closest friend. Someone who you’d feel comfortable around. But in their case, the wife feels uncomfortable around her husband- she stares at him from her right eye. She notices a spider’s web on the ceiling, which suggests that indeed, her mind is somewhere. From my perspective, Alifa Rifaat uses the spider’s web as a metaphor. The wife is trapped in her home. Although she did the webs by herself, she feels trapped in it, unable to move freely as she pleases.

As the narrative progresses, the story shifts to the wife’s thoughts about their intimate lives. She was once her husband’s flower. Once, he loved her and showered her with kisses, love, attention, and everything in between. Although the author did not mention when exactly all the feelings died down, I suggest it happened after their first child. I once read a Twitter thread about how men change when their wife gives birth to their first child. While some change positively, adjusting to new roles, others change negatively. Infidelity seeps in and the husband starts to see another woman. This, in turn, bridged a gap between them.

She recalls trying to connect with her husband and make him continue their intimate moment. The writer's words paint an image of a husband who engages in intimate moments not out of love or desire, but out of obligation. The last time the wife tried to get him to satisfy her needs, he became angry and pushed her away. 'The last time she had made such an attempt, she was so desperate at that critical moment that she dug her fingernails into his back, trying to keep him inside her. He shouted as he pushed her away and pulled out: 'Are you crazy, woman? Do you want to kill me?' This line confirms my notion that the husband is completely disconnected, both emotionally and physically. As sad as it seems, nothing the woman does can rekindle the lost affection, as her husband's heart is elsewhere.

How can the wife reconnect with her husband and break the emotional barrier he's built? What steps can she take to regain the lost attention and affection? In the end, does she make her husband see her in a new light and appreciate their union? I recommend you read this short story by Alifa Rifaat.

Thubnail designed using Canva.

Thanks for reading.