HIVE REACHOUT WEEKLY PROMPT 31 // HOW I MANAGE MY ANGER

Managing my anger has been a journey for me, especially since I tend to get upset over small things. It’s not like I wake up trying to get angry, but sometimes, the smallest annoyances can trigger it. For example, when I’m running late and someone cuts me off in traffic, my blood pressure rises. My mind starts racing, and I can’t shake that irritation. It feels silly, but in the moment, it seems big. I’ll replay the situation in my head, which only makes it worse. The same thing happens at work when a colleague misses a deadline or when a simple task turns into a bigger problem than it should be.

I’ve realized a lot of my anger comes from a need for control. When things don’t go as expected, or I feel disrespected, even a little, I react. I remember one time waiting for a friend at a restaurant. They were really late, and I felt frustrated. I didn’t know why it bothered me so much, but I guess I felt let down. Instead of letting it go, I let the anger build. Looking back, it seemed like an overreaction, but it was tied to the feeling that my time wasn’t valued. That’s something I often struggle with.

To cope, I’ve started being more aware of my emotions. When I feel anger building up, I try to pause and breathe before reacting (I go relax small, no rush to react). At first, it felt like a small thing, but now it’s been a game-changer. For example, if I get frustrated over a minor mistake at work, I take a moment to breathe before addressing it. I’ve learned it’s usually not as big a deal as I think, and often, it’s just stress or feeling overwhelmed. Taking that pause helps me see things more clearly and not blow them out of proportion (I no go make small matter big).

I’ve also been working on expressing my feelings calmly. In the past, I’d bottle up my anger or lash out, which never helped. Now, I make an effort to communicate how I feel without attacking anyone. There was a time with a friend where I was annoyed, but instead of holding it in or snapping, I calmly explained why I was upset and what I needed from them. It felt good to express myself in a way that didn’t escalate the situation, and surprisingly, it brought us closer. It’s still a work in progress, but I’ve noticed that being open and honest without letting anger take over works wonders.

That said, I’m still learning. There are days when stress takes over, and I struggle to stay calm (I go try control my wahala). It’s not easy, and I’m not perfect, but I’m improving at managing my anger. The biggest change has been realizing that it’s okay to be upset, but it doesn’t have to control me. Now, when those little things start to trigger me, I try to step back, breathe, and choose how I respond (I go take time, calm down before I act). Honestly, that change has made all the difference.

Thank you 🙏 hive_reachout for giving me the privilege to express my anger control.*