The love red flag

'Nothing lasts forever' is a popular saying I have come to agree with, as even life itself is whisked from our helpless selves. Love, though a beautiful phenomenon, remains a strange mystery, oftentimes making us wonder how we got to be in the spot we found ourselves. Strange things do happen when we are in love or even hold people dear to our hearts. Oftentimes, we look tough on the outside; at least we make the world believe we are tough, while when we are with those we love, we could be the humblest of souls.

One of my major relationship resolutions is to not advise people in love. Personally, I feel everything I have to say would fall on deaf ears, and they may make up eventually and term you the Satan in all the story. Guess you're eager to know what happened exactly?

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For anonymity sake, let me say the lady's name in question is Kate. Kate and I were so cool, and our connection was like a sparkle, at least so I thought. Fast forward to an incident that made me rethink if we would be compatible as a couple. I had visited a friend of mine who lived on a farm. It was my first time visiting him in his house—on the farm—and I got both emotional and excited when I saw the simple lifestyle he lived. I knew we had many connections even though I didn't live on a farm. But my background was the lowly type, and I love or express anything beyond that even though I tried to stay average. My respect and admiration for my friend were on the high side. He was not the typical picture of what he looked like if you met him in town. He was neat, good-looking, jovial, and smartly dressed. How could such a young man live on a farm house? My amazement didn't cease.

And Voila, I was excited to break the news to this beautiful lady I hoped we could spend forever with.

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"What do you mean by that?" Kate shot at me. I thought she was joking until she made her position clear to me. She told me about how her people and background do not take money for granted. Truthfully, I did all I could to make her comfortable and sacrificed more than necessary for her. Kindness runs in my family, and I didn't spare any resources to make her comfortable. I made a joke out of the conversation, and our fantasy world continued. I was one of those who trusted in the bonds of affection and went all in.
We barely spent a year together, and as usual, the love that was thought could stand the test of time came crumbling and shattering. I tried to salvage, but some words cut sharper and deeper than swords. Her ending statement was, 'I never dipped my hands in your pocket'. I was badly hurt, not just because of the statement but because of her position that led to the separation.

Time heals all things, but it took me two years to clear our chats. Eventually, I had to let go and accept the obvious. We caught up a few times later, more mature about everything, and we apologized to each other. We both messed up in our little corners.

I know you would probably laugh at my next lines. The lady Kate is now overseas and doing well, I guess, while the friend I admired and myself are still hustling but thanking God here in Nigeria.

My thoughts: It's good to aim high but not out of desperation. I know there are people who would do all it takes to be rich, wealthy, or fulfilled, but life's not a race about another. Life's a thread line we're walking on, sometimes needing the help of others to support us, and at other times, we may just do well all by ourselves.

Thank you for reading. I would love to have your comments and contributions.