When Life Happens...

It’s not something I like to do. Preparing myself for the worst. But sometimes I feel it’s necessary to limit our expectations, brace ourselves for disappointment and work actively to plan for the way forward if whatever we were expecting doesn’t come to fruition.

That’s how Plan B, C and D come into play. Because no matter how much we plan for something, we should always prepare ourselves for the possibility that those things may not turn out the way we want. I know we’re supposed to have positive thoughts and be optimistic.

But life, with all our well-thought-out plans, and all our careful listings, could happen. And when it does, complete with all the unprecedented surprises, that would most likely alter or even tumble our plans like a stack of cards.

As the year began, I became active with writing in my diary, keeping a journal of all my goals, both short-term and long-term. I don’t know how laid out they are but it’s something that I’ve been working on since December and like everyone else, it’s essential to mental and financial well-being that these goals are met.

But I must keep in mind that anything could happen. As impossible as it is to tell what will happen to us in the next minute, we can’t ever know the events that will happen to us in the space of six months. The experiences we’ll have, the occurrences that would shape us or even change us. And the truth is, these occurrences wouldn’t shape us alone, but our dreams, goals and even our priorities.

No one hopes for downfall, and I’ve been trying since the year began to manifest positivity in everything I do. But I’m glad this prompt by @kenechukwu97, has given me a chance to reflect and take into consideration the possibility of my goals not nearly coming to fruition in the next six months. And here’s what I would do in that hypothetical situation.

The first thing is to read through my journal where I carefully listed my goals and review them. I’m not one to write impossible goals that aren’t remotely feasible. But by reviewing it, I’d find goals that I most likely didn’t think through enough. And by evaluating them, I’ll ask myself questions. Was this a smart goal? If yes, why didn’t it work out? Was it by my failings or a circumstance out of my control? What are the chances that I can still achieve this goal?

I mean, one of the things that qualifies us as mature adults, in my opinion, is our ability to ask ourselves hard questions and even more, when those questions are about things that affect well-being. We should be able to answer those hard questions and brace ourselves for the bitter truths that follow.

I think the next thing I would do after carefully outlining those truths in my head, is searching for a way forward. We’re all human and by nature, emotional beings. But I don’t think if after six months I find out that none of my goals has been met and I go back on the new resolutions I’d made, I’ll keep on shooting myself on the foot by dwelling in self-pity and grieving and berating myself for my failings. It’s six months left and I realize that every minute counts. So, I’ll try to set myself in that mood for reflection and motivation.

I can imagine that I would feel demotivated and nearly sinking into depression, so if it’s self-help books or a video or a message that would boost my confidence in myself once more and renew my motivation to surge forward and this time harder. I can’t count the number of times I’ve been stirred to do productive things that I didn’t think I would do because I heard the right message. Putting this into perspective, it would be my next point of call.

Since I’ve had six months to evaluate myself, I’m aware of the reasons why I didn’t achieve my goals. I’m not one to blame anyone and if I didn’t achieve anything, I’d be willing to take responsibility for it. But in this scenario, I wouldn’t just acknowledge them, but I’d write them down. Writing things down is my way of giving life to something, making it sink into my consciousness that this thing exists and I should tailor my actions moving forward to not remotely getting involved in things that would take me back there.

I’ll have accountability partners to foster me in this new journey of mine for the next six months. People who would be loving but strict enough to push me so that I don’t lose sight of my goals or lose focus, and worse of all. Get demotivated. As much as I believe in being independent in my dealings, there’s power when more people join forces. (Lol. I’m beginning to sound like a member of the Justice League.)

At the end of the day, if I let myself dwell on the failures of the last six months, I’d never move forward. So after planning and restructuring my goals from the foundation, I’ll immediately run with it. And hopefully, and God willing, I’ll have something way better to say at the end of the year.

Jhymi🖤

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