My "Ausome" Journey Through Motherhood with Jeff Emmanuel - From Determining Symptoms of Autism to How We Trained Jeff Achieved the Basic Life Skills

When a woman starts to accept and feel a motherly feeling with the life inside her womb, she also begins to embrace motherhood. She will feel excited with "What will be his name?", "Will he look like his father?", "Will he be intelligent like his mother? Lots of things will run through her mind.

Good Day, Hivers! HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to all the mothers in the world. I would like to highlight that this article is not posted to gain sympathy or collect any emotional comments, but this is posted purely for AWARENESS. Early detection and acceptance of Autism Spectrum is better than denial and negligence, or sometimes it may lead to abandonment.

CHILD HISTORY
When I learned that another baby was coming, as our second born, and the ultrasound result showed that it was a baby boy, I was excited to collect name ideas. Until I settled with Jeff Emmanuel. Emmanuel means the Lord is with us. When he was born, he was the heaviest baby in the nursery, weighing nine pounds, and I had to go through a C-section.

At one, Jeff started to walk and talk, and sing, and count as every normal child does. He was a sweet, playful, happy baby and was adorable.

At three, I noticed something had changed with Jeff. He became withdrawn; he wanted to play alone. If I called his name, he turned his head, but would not listen to anything I said. He doesn't talk anymore, he doesn't count, and everything is gone. I also noticed that he doesn't look at me, eye to eye anymore, and when upset, he will bang his head on the wall.

Another thing was, he became extra hyperactive, so he wanted to climb on top of tables and cabinets. There were times when his sleep patterns were altered, and I had a hard time putting him to sleep. He lined up his toys, our spoons, and shoes in very straight lines, this became his way of playing.

He became choosy with foods, he doesn't like soft-textured foods. He had tantrums and meltdowns. By then, something was bothering my mind. At four, we brought him to a developmental doctor, and it was found out that he has severe autism and hyperactivity.

I was confused, I was sad, I was crying at night, and I was praying that my son would go back to normal as before. It was the hardest to accept, I blamed myself and everyone. I was lost for some time. But prayers helped me through those darkest parts. I learned to accept, I learned to love him unconditionally!

I researched the condition of my son, I went to different doctors, I sent him to Occupational Therapies, and it made me more financially drained, but it doesn't matter to me. I brought him to homeopathic doctors and took him anywhere I could find answers to my questions. I took him to Cebu to check his genes. But all test results showed no cause or reason for Jeff's condition. No recommended medications aside from occupational and speech therapy.

I enrolled Jeff in a public school SPED class. I told myself that I would never stop and give up on Jeff. Those times when he spit on us, he hand-painted his poop on the wall and to his face, those times when he hurt himself and tear up all his clothes and our clothes when he was then 9 or 10, those times made me weak but I didn't gave up.

CHILDREN WITH AUTISM CAN LEARN
Good thing my parents were with me during those times. They helped me take care of Jeff to gave him training every day. We made sure that Jeff learned the basic life skills. And we are successful in making Jeff know how to take care of himself. He can eat by himself, he can take his bath, and he can put on his clothes and put on his shoes. He knows how to do toothbrushing and handwashing, and has learned how to clean himself after toilet. I am forever grateful to my parents. With consistency, firmness in giving the tasks, and motivation, Jeff achieved the basics.

We cherished every little milestone of Jeff. Until today at 17, Jeff is still non-verbal, but we are happy, though. He is now manageable, and for sure, we know that Jeff knows what we are talking about and what we are doing every day. He understands our words, he follows instructions and commands. And he does his basic life skills routines religiously every day.

FAITH AND ACCEPTANCE
Many times in my life, I questioned God for giving me a son like Jeff. Those were the times when I was still struggling to accept Jeff's condition. Right after full acceptance, I realized that God has faith in me, he gave me Jeff because He knew from the start that I could love and accept Jeff, whatever his condition is.

PARENTS WITH CHILDREN UNDER THE AUTISM SPECTRUM ARE CHOSEN
Yes! We are by God to become parents with these awesome and wonderful children. I always say, these children are amazing. They may be having trouble expressing themselves, having a hard time socializing with others, having a hard time controlling their emotions and physical movements, yet there is something very special in them that only they have. They are artists, they are musicians, they are inventors, they are scientists, they are special.

MESSAGE TO PARENTS WITH CHILDREN WITH AUTISM
Always made your child feel that he is part of the family, no matter what his condition is. Bring him wherever you go. Let him go out with you. Don't be afraid, don't be ashamed. When he felt accepted, he would be determined to do his best.

Today, I enrolled myself in MA-SPED not just for professional development but to know and learn more about this condition. I will do everything to help Jeff and other children with Autism and empower parents to accept, love, and have more faith.

If you are still with me up to this point, thank you very much. I know my article is broad and not very specific, especially on how we managed Jeff's behavior and how we imposed firmness, motivation, and consistency. Autism is too broad to discuss, this may take me hundreds of thousands of words if I have to tackle everything specifically. Thank you for the understanding.

Again, Happy Mother's Day to all Hivers who are mothers and to those who accepted the role of a mother. Have a great day everyone.