SPENDING MORE TIME TOGETHER TO IGNITE MORE BONDING

You know the saying that there is time for everything under the sun? Well I think it’s applicable to most things if not everything we can think of. I know we are in the digital era and everyone is trying not to miss out from the so many opportunities that are online but then that doesn’t mean we should neglect some things because they might come back to haunt us later.

I remember about two years ago, I lived with a family I wasn’t related to in anyway but somehow we bonded so well and I became a part of that family and I lived with them for almost a year! Well I lived with mostly the parents because the children were not around, some where in school while the others don’t work in that town so I was there to help out with a few things. During my stay there, I got to learn the way of that family and I got to realize that it’s not easy to be the head of a family and making the best choices for everyone.

The father of the house was someone that is very educated and he had some great insight of things and that was what he used to help everyone make a better choice for themselves. He is not so authoritative but then he will always make sure to play the ball to your court and you will have little or no choice but to play that ball or just stay there to watch it stay still. For the time I spent with them, I was so fond of using my phone anytime I was eating and somehow that made the father of the house not happy.

It was on a faithful morning when I finished preparing beans which was the usual meal for that household. I served daddy’s own on the dining table and then I served for myself but I didn’t want to eat on the dining table because I knew if I was there I won’t be able to press my phone while I eat. At first daddy and mummy never wanted to say anything about that because they feel it was because I was still trying to adjust to the house but that wasn’t true at all. I just wanted my phone to get my attention rather than them. Of course that’s not how I would normally put it but in the end that is it.

So while I was eating and using my phone at the same time, it was as if daddy knew what I was doing so he walked quietly close to me, I won’t lie I was shocked to hear his voice so close 😂 but I tried to act like I wasn’t. Do you know what he said? His question always rings in my head every time I eat and operate my device. He said, “..so if you leave your phone for 30 minutes to eat will something happen to you?” In my mind I was trying to think of a thousand ways to defend myself but then those works kept my mind occupied and I saw wisdom in it.

I’m someone that once enjoyed eating with my family or anyone I’m close with but over time that changed. I cared less if there were peo around at least not when my phone is there with me. I do interact with those around me when my phone is with me but it has to be something really important. I no longer give response to every little questions and comments, I rather use that time to be on my phone. I’ve been told quite a number of times that I focus too much on my phone. The truth is I know that I use my phone too much too but then it’s not easy to change that.

When we are around people, it’s just best that we give attention to them as much as possible because we don’t know what they might be going through. Having a family becomes more interesting when there is good communication but with our devices with us during family time, it’s almost impossible to give the needed time to your family. Sometimes I just have to put off my phone and interact with the people around me because it is something that is necessary.

But then due to how tempting it is to just give up our phones, it’s just necessary to gave have an accountability partner or someone who can be there to caution you. Like I said, there is time for everything and it will be really helpful if we try to give attention to the things that needs attention. Personally I’d love to teach my future family how to do better and maybe that way I can even learn to do better myself. By doing that, they get to see me and correct me when I do something that I asked them not to do.

The only thing stopping me from doing what is right is myself. I’m guilty as charged so it would be hard to tell others to do something that I don’t do. But I’d keep trying to work on myself so I don’t make my children do worst, lol.

This is my response to the Hivelearners topic on “FAMILY TIME , NO TIME”.