EMBRACING MY WORTH : A PATH TO SUSTAINABLE RELATIONSHIPS

Extending love to others is something I fancy a lot because, for some reason, I struggle to give that love to others. At some point in my life, I just had to tell myself that it's something I delight in, so why not make it a lifestyle? Well, I know that you might be thinking of possible reasons by now because there are many reasons why it would be hard to make it a lifestyle. For me, the only challenge I had, or I have, is the fact that I'm still struggling within myself if I truly love myself.

Loving others comes easily when we love ourselves. At least, that's what I believe, so most times when I struggle to give love to others as I should, I just know that I'm struggling to give that same love to myself. Sometimes I find it hard to let myself love me because I feel like it's not necessary, but it's only a matter of time before I will get to see why it's important that I love myself to give that love to others.

At some point in my life, I kind of loved others even more than I loved myself, but then it wasn't sustainable at all. I find myself easily feeling like I did the wrong thing loving them once they offend me or do something wrong. Well, it's only normal to regret the good we've done when it's been repaid with bad. It took me quite some time to understand that loving someone is not just for them but for myself. Loving people genuinely only means that I'm loving myself right, and that means I'm growing.

I've struggled with quite a lot of things growing up, and one of those things is communicating my thoughts across to people. Most times, I just feel like it's no use saying what's on my mind because I'm scared that I might be wrong or I might be misunderstood. I just preferred that others speak while I listen instead, because the moment I try to say what's on my mind, I'd do it excessively, and that was a problem.

Somehow, I was really good at sustaining a conversation for quite a while, but it gets harder with time, and I find myself disagreeing with almost everything again. I've always been told how important it is to communicate right, but that was my one major challenge. I enjoyed communicating with people, yes, but sustaining such communication was the problem, and that affected me as I found it hard to keep some really good friends.

I think it was at that point when I realized I had a problem with communication that I noticed I was not loving right, and I knew I needed fixing. Sometimes I get really surprised when people say they love my company. For me, I feel like I was the worst at whatever I was doing, and that was my second limitation. The way I thought about myself in my head was so bad, and it reflected in my life too.

Luckily for me, I've been blessed with really nice people who always reminded me to think more highly of myself. Now that I think of it more, I keep realizing why I'm struggling in so many aspects of my life; it's just how my mind works, it's limiting me in most ways. I'm working on that part of me, but I still keep finding myself not taking it seriously most times too.

I'm not sure what I've said here, but I just wanted to let all of these out of my mind in hope of finding what is wrong, so the solution would be the major thing I'd be focusing on.