What the struggle is about... Marriage standards!
Hello everyone, welcome to this platform. Love is a beautiful thing so is marriage even though am not in the space for all those drama now I still admire good couples when I see them starting from my background. What usually make me hungry for marriage or even to marry quickly is actually when I see the way some couples live or when I see well brought up children who are so beautiful and handsome.
What standards have I set myself to achieve before even thinking of getting married?
I normally hear some people setting their standards for the features the want in their partner and It sometimes make me laugh, there's this saying that says "are you the type of your type" the person you are imagining to marry are you up to his/her own standards, I believe we have to work on ourselves first before even wanting others to be with us.
You don't expect to be idle, very lazy, nonchalant about life, low in fashion sense and you would be desiring a wealthy man, very hand working, intelligent, handsome and responsible man... How does that even work?, So I would say try working on yourselves so that you can be other people's standards.
What are your standards for marriage??
Having worked on yourself, build up yourself that's where the standards come in. Something happened to me recently, I have known this person for some few weeks we weren't that close it was just like I know the face, one thing led to another and we started talking till this small small gist led to him telling me his intentions about him seeing a future with us, so this was how I reacted to him.
I wasn't that blunt but I made sure I print an image of what he was talking about just in case he didn't have the full clue. I explained to him how my journey before getting married was far and how he wasn't ready for what he was insinuating, he didn't have a stable income, was still struggling to find his feet, wasn't in the capacity to take care of an extra human being talk more of the ones to come, and if we were to go through my desires he was ticking any of those box so I decided to look further and that was me setting my standards.
I believe even though some of these partners doesn't sometimes tick those boxes we should look beyond. Apart from the financial capacity I would want a friend, a father, a brother and a husband all in one package, a friend is actually someone I can talk to without fear tell him his mistakes with love and definitely not be afraid to be around him and I want that in my husband, I want a father who would protect me with jealousy, care about me, put me first and many more in my husband, I would definitely want a brother who I can relate with laugh with lie on his body and so on.
I definitely want beyond the regular marriage I see in the society and with the resilience in me to be better plus achieve more I pray I would get more than the package I seek for.
Thank you to all of you for being supportive and for visiting my blog I still remain your girl @graceze.
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You had a great point there and that is that we must always hold ourselves to the same standards we expect from others.
Financial capability should be one of the standards, though a tricky one, but yes, I do agree with you.
It really gives me joy to see a happy marriage.
Waooo I love your way, some ladies will just relax thinking that beauty alone is enough to get them rich and wealthy husband, those wealthy men are looking for responsible ladies who have something to offer too.
Hello @graceze
Kindly share your post link to scifimultiverse discord and mention 3 authors you supported.
Actually there is this saying that "You attracts what you are and not what you want".
So working on ourselves to be that kind of person we wanted for ourselves is a key standard. Thanks for sharing man
Sometimes looking at the financial aspect has made many people to marry the wrong men. But still marriage is luck cause human being changes.
I really love how you emphasized self-growth before setting standards for a partner. Your mindset is inspiring, and I totally agree that we should work on ourselves first before expecting so much from someone else.
You would get more than what you seek for.
I love the kind of standard you set for yourself, And I think everyone needs that partner that will give he or she a listening ear and being open to take corrections be it the head or the neck of the House 😂. Some men doesn't acknowledge their mistake but they want their wives to and that alone is a red flag for me.