Stereotypes: A Reflection of Our Own Biases

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There is a common saying that people will say whatever they feel like saying, but it shouldn't define us or make us feel less of ourselves. Stereotyping has been in existence for ages; it didn't start now, and certainly, the end of this very act is not seeing its end soon. If we check ourselves, we've also at one point been on the giving or receiving end, and I've had my fair share as well.

With age, I've come to realize that it isn't fair to judge people based on their looks, beliefs, ethnic group, or tribe, which is one of the major categorised stereotypes in this part of the world. Without further ado, I will be sharing with you, some of the stereotypes I've had to face and am still facing.

She's Proud or Forming

Do I like keeping to myself? Yes, no matter where I stay, I enjoy the privacy of my home, my thoughts, my job, as well as my family. But you see that extra time to chit chat or lazy talk with my neighbours who don't work at home like myself makes some of them assume I'm forming. When does minding one's business signify being proud? I believe this is an introvert problem, because maybe if I were an extrovert, I wouldn't have to be stereotyped in such a way.

My previous residence was hellish because my then land lady expected me to be like her, and I couldn't change my lifestyle to blend with hers, which generated jealousy and hatred from her, when I noticed her behaviour and constant trouble, I had to result to getting a new apartment, because I seriously don't have the strength for problems/wahala like my people call it. Thankfully, my current neighbours are the peaceful and business-minded people like myself, no stereotypes of any sort here.

I like cooking

This is another common stereotype I get, especially whenever I introduce myself as a lady from Akwa-Ibom state. We are stereotyped to be good cooks, so anyone from Akwa-Ibom, whether male or female, must love to cook and know how to cook very well. Hmm.. Do I know how to cook, yes, but do I really love to cook, no, I mostly prefer being served the meal, yes, I love good food, but cooking wears me out and makes me easily get tired of eating after spending the whole time in the kitchen. Luckily for me, I have a partner who understands this part of me, and doesn't enforce that I cook all the time; he easily takes over when I have a very busy day working, which is often, or on days when my health is down. Funny thing is, a friend once told me he helps because he is also from Akwa-Ibom state, this is so funny, I rather want to believe he helps because he is also a part of the family, he is being supportive as well, cooking doesn't have to be gender based in marriage the way providing for the family is not one sided either.

These experiences have taught me that stereotypes often stem from misconceptions and a lack of understanding. It is important to look beyond the surface and get to know people as individuals before concluding. Stereotypes will continue to exist, but we have the power to choose how we respond to them. We can either let them define us or rise above them.