Living Wlith Neighbours in my own way

On this topic, I will say it is a personal thing and our upbringing differs. Growing up, we were always on our own, with no attachment to the neighbors. From school, home, and even to church, there was no relationship whatsoever. I remember how I would ask my mum to let me visit my bestie, and the way her eyes would give me that signal to keep my mouth shut from repeating such a request. Visiting neighbors was out of the question. So, we grew up playing with ourselves, and even till I graduated from the university, there was no neighborly friendship. I was always in my lane.

I could stay inside my room from morning till night, and if I didn’t want my hostel mates to know, they wouldn’t know. Because of this upbringing, I’m also teaching that part to my kids. We live in a four-bedroom flat apartment—two downstairs, two upstairs. My neighbor and I can spend one or two weeks without crossing each other, whether in the morning or at night. Once I leave in the morning and return in the evening, you won’t see me outside again until the next day. This is not pride, it is simply the way I was brought up. And we all know we live in a world where privacy is prioritized for safety. In Lagos, the slogan is simple: everyone minds his or her business, no one sees anyone.

However, I believe we must at least know our neighbors by name, by work, or other crucial information because, one way or another, things like electricity bills or other utility issues will eventually bring us together. But knowing my neighbor does not mean I must have a friendship with them, sit down to gossip, chit-chat unnecessarily, or spend my time in their apartment. If I don’t do that, it doesn’t mean I don’t know them. As sensitive as I am, our paths might not cross frequently, but if I want to know all about you, I will.

Leaving my children in the hands of my neighbor is something my husband and I have never done. There was a time somebody on my street asked how we managed to keep our children off the street like other children. Hmm… we started while they were still babies, and it has shaped them to date. They can’t be found in the compound without a solid reason if we are not there with them. From home to school in the school bus, and from school back home, straight inside until we return. And the Lord has been faithful in keeping them safe while we are away.

Will I knock on my neighbor’s door if an emergency arises? Yes, I will, because we are not fighting. We just don’t relate much, since everyone minds their business.

Some neighbors are funny, just a little closeness, and they begin to take it too far. My neighbor may knock on my door to ask for this and that, but I will never do the same. This is not pride but self-discipline.

The image used is mine.

My participation in the #hivelearnerscommunity contest on the topic: *Know your neighbor"