Rain, Soil Temp, Ice Box, Dart Board, Hawks Suck, MAJOR Realizations, Fire, Comedians, BOOM Therapy - Sunday

This was the view for the whole day, foggy and dreary.

The rains had turned everything into a skating rink and the paths were all sheets of ice. It made getting around the farm a bit tricky all day long.

After my MASSIVE HUGE realizations I needed to talk to my Father before I made any choices or decisions. We talked for over an hour and I was able to solidify where I stand and where my line is set.

When I first really started throwing darts he told me that he used to throw A LOT and I remember us having a board when I was young but he didn't throw regularly. I'd wanted to do this but needed to ask if he wanted it first but I have a board and darts delivering to him on Wednesday. There are darts apps that allow for playing against each other remotely that I will be looking into so he and the boys and I can all be able to play games together despite him being in California and us here in Washington.

The Seahawks played and like Seattle sucked massively. I've been finding myself dreaming more of the "big one" that rips the west coast off and dumps it in the ocean. It would save so many of us from the tyranny imposed by the left side of the country.

I had a HUGE slap in the face. Like the Will Smith Chris Rock type of slap. I became acutely aware, in an instant, of the levels of manipulation that have gone. It was incredible the feeling of awakening but the rage that came out was really needed to go. It was the smell that triggered me so strongly. It's her, her fear, her psychosis, her attempts to drag others into her little bubble. Whatever that essential oil is it has had the exact opposite reaction that she was hoping. It has only made me more enraged every time I have smelled it and yesterday it all came crashing in on me. I reached down to pet our dog and when I pulled my hands up I could smell whatever that shit is and it became glaringly obvious that she was coated in the shit before coming to the house. It was all over the doors and everything she touched. It is a blatant attempt at manipulation and I am DONE!!!!! That made my decision right then and there. I. AM. DONE.

I got the fire going in the pit to grill our burgers but then I spent another hour on the phone with my Father hashing out some of this shit that I am realizing. My entire childhood my relationship with my father was poisoned by my mother and she manipulated me into being on "her side" which killed any chance of he and I having a real father/son relationship. Her selfishness, her living in her little fantasy bubble of "you make your own reality" and all this supposed "self work" that she has stumbled head long into has done nothing to deal with her core issues. Selfish, manipulative, and just fucking evil.

I needed a change of mental space so I put on comedians. The first was Dave's new special and damn it he is a seriously funny human being. He embodies the truth of comedy and it was such a good special.

Then the other Dave. From keen insights to crass and crude. They both are legends in the comedy world and it gave me gut hurting laughs that I REALLY REALLY needed.

My night became about BOOM therapy. I've not shot my guns in a long time and having just picked up a few boxes of ammo I felt it was the best thing for me. I grew up shooting, from the time I was 3 I can remember. This exact .44 mag pistol was in my hands with my father's around mine and I can still feel the kick of that initial gun blast as I got pushed back into him when I pulled the trigger. That is so core to my being and it felt EXTREMELY good to return to that core.

It was a foggy new years eve and I was out past the greenhouse shooting at the wooden fence posts of the garden.

At first I was using just my headlamp but was not able to see the post very well and was missing most shots. It is only a 4 inch wide post so with me being out of practice I did still manage to hit it a few times. The 9mm has a lot more capacity than my revolver and it was OUTSTANDING what happened.

I stood with my pistol aimed at the post and all up and down the valley there was fireworks and guns blasting all evening. This point in time it was quite and I aimed then let loose the full clip at max speed. THEN it happened. The neighbors let a clip go, then another, then another, then up the valley a clip was emptied, then another farther down. IT WAS FUCKING AWESOME! That was so fun to hear the cacophony of gun blasts following in succession after my initial volley. I was screaming out in joy. I needed that.

I went back inside and got a few glow sticks which I then took out and tacked to the fence post. It really helped and on my first shot I hit the ring and broke it open.

The 9mm is a nice solid gun and even though it is part poly it has a pretty easy recenter without much wobble or sway.

It felt sooooooo good to be throwing lead. I've been meaning to setup the range but now I have the real impetus to make it happen.

We went to soak and were out by 11:30.

To ring in the new year we watched Half Baked. I went and shot a bunch more rounds at midnight and reveled in the mass of explosions ringing out up and down the valley.

This morning Luke Littler won again in darts and is on his way to potentially winning the tournament. The Kraken play their outdoor game after noon which they will likely loose against Vegas, I will do some more shooting, I'm going to grill steaks for us tonight as @stryeyz asked, and I have a lot of thinking to do as these past 48 hours have opened up a lot of PTSD in my head that I have needed to deal with. It's never the "right" time for this shit to happen but it is so I need to not push it aside and actually deal with it.

Here's to a transformative 2024!

^Affiliate/Referral Link^

For more information about our farm:
Fleming Family Farm
FLEMING FAMILY FARM, LLC
Sustainable & Organic Methods | Heirloom Produce

All images are original works of Fleming Family Farm unless otherwise notated and credited.

If you find this post useful or entertaining, your support is greatly appreciated by upvoting, following, and sharing!

You can Also Find Me On:

GAB
Nostr

Donations or Tips

My Amazon Wish List

BTC : 1C6idTJBJ3CJJt9kHoKi4av1XLzg8eQ7rv
ETH : 0x55DB9322b4Cbdc772F93B261c580CfDe4B054e23

VSC Wrapped Bitcoin - flemingfarm

Zap Me ⚡️

---