Unexpected family crisis: choosing between the blood or the bond.

4 months ago

As it ever occurred to you that life is chaotic, nothing is certain or promised. We humans live our lives without being cognisance of how precious the present is, all we worry about is what comes next tomorrow which deprives us of the joy of the moment. Everyone has a comfort or safety zone, for most humans it is our family. People we can truly rely on because we are rest assured that they have our best interest at heart. One of the most beautiful thing about family is the ability of each member to trust one another, creating an unbreakable bond.

Have you ever wondered what truly makes a family? Is it the blood or the bond? I mean it is always easier for people to believe that whoever they share blood relations with automatically makes them family, is that really true? For most children family is the first agent of socialisation, parents being the sole guardian of the family. Being empowered with the responsibility of taking care of the children and directing them towards the right path. As a child grows older, the blood matters not but what truly matters is seeing individuals caring for their day to day needs automatically creates a bond between the parents and child regardless of the blood.

I mean I have heard of stories where by a child was mistakenly or intentionally swapped in the hospital without the knowledge of the parents. Both family took their child home thinking is theirs and they lived for many years before the truth eventually erupt but before the whole truth was discovered, I'm sure they all lived together like family, smiling together and bonding. Everything changes when the children finally discover who their true parents is, they become confused about which one to choose, the family they have known and bonded with or their biological parents.

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What about cases of adoption, where the kids are adopted at a very young age without any knowledge of who their biological parents are but eventually they figure it out and suddenly they become pained and feeling the need to seek out their biological parents, it makes you wonder, is that really necessary? I'm sure they want answers, they want to know who their biological parents are but it doesn't change the facts. They were adopted for a particular reason, it is either they were abandoned or their biological parents died or they were willingly given up for adoption by their parents due to one reason or the other.

Situations like this are always very tricky because the moment a child finds out about his parents not being his/her biological parents the need to seek out their biological parents will supercede any other desire they might have, with their emotions clouding their judgement and reasoning. Well putting myself in their shoes, I mean finding out about being adopted through a document after living with my "supposed" adopted family for years, what exactly would be my reaction?

Just like I said earlier, it all depends on the reason behind the adoption and the nature of my "supposed" adopted parents. Situations like this are always very sensitive but as long as I believe the adoption was based on all the right reasons and my "supposed" adopted parents happens to be very good people, I might be obliged to choose the family I have bonded with than going after my "supposed" biological parents I'm yet to know. Truth be told, when it comes to matters such as this, it is difficult to really predict the actions that will be taken.