Concept of parenthood: Necessary qualities expected of a parent to possess. LOH #186

In recent times, the concept of parenthood now depends on the ability to give birth to a child, which is not suppose to be so. There are specific life lessons and principles every parents needs to have undergo before being a parent. The concepts of "baby" parent is derived from the fact that a lot of youths who are not up to the age of being a parent but due to their luxurious items and properties they own, they are of the mindset that they have what it takes to be a parent, Does wealth make you qualified to be a father or a mother?

A video went viral recently on social media which has led to a lot of controversies among men and women in the society, in the video, a father is seen smoking and also giving it to a child who is not more than 3 years old of age, the mother is the one making the video and laughing in the background. There was another video that was recently trending on tiktok, in the video a guy who is identified as the father of the female child being displayed n the video, the father was engaging in an act that he might consider an act of love but to the viewers it felt child molestation due to the child's age.

This brought a lot of worrisome thought into my mind and I kept on thinking, what kind of a future could such children have especially in a country that pays less attention to child abuse in the society. A child does not have the ability to choose who his or her parents will be, this has made a lot of children to be subjected to immature attitude of some youths who are not qualified to be parents.

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In the neighbourhood where I live, I saw a lot of children engage in improper activities despite living with their parents, a lot of them have gotten accustomed to the get rich quick syndrome which deprived them from the ability to engage in hard work. Firstly I thought, it can't be the fault of the parents entirely but parents have a significant role to play before such situation get out of hand, parents are the first agent of socialisation for a child. I have seen a lot of parents request for luxurious items from their children despite having the knowledge of illegal activities such child is doing to acquire wealth. What has parenthood become? is this what it means to be civilised? a lot of thought such as this kept crossing my mind.

I kept wondering what could be the way forward, how could the government or society regulate this improper parenthood in underdeveloped and developing nations. I know of childcare services in developed countries but in countries where there is less investment in such child care services what will be the fate of those children subjected to such parents. In the absence of child care services I believe there are some qualities that every parent needs to posses which includes.

1. MATURITY: It might sound odd but we have a lot of baby parents out there who are not matured enough to give birth to a child but as a result of one reason or the other they already have children. It is not as it is that it is only people who are fully grown that qualifies to become a parent, like I have always said being old does not mean you are matured, if that is so now imagine the probability of young guy/girl that is just few years away from puberty being matured, what are the odds? There are some mentality a human developed when he or she is matured and such mentality is expected of a parent.

2. DISCIPLINE: Sometimes I witness some attitude from some parents and I'm like if you could act like this in front of your child what do you expect your children to do when they come of age. There are some certain things a parent should never do in front of a child to prevent them from immoral exposure. A parents needs to be disciplined enough to understand how he or she must act in front of their child, you might think a child is too young to notice your indecent behaviour as a parent but when they start exhibiting such behaviour that is when you will realise they were aware of it all along.

3. SELFLESSNESS: Parents are guardians of their children, I'm not sure if many parents knows what this means. When you identify yourself as a guardian of a child in school, you need to ask yourself what exactly is the responsibility of a guardian. A parent must be willing to do what ever it takes to ensure a child follows the right path, it is not an option but a necessity. A parent must be selflessness enough to be the needs of their children first at all times because the moment you decide to have a child, You are no longer living for you but for your child.

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I do hope for a day when a system will be put in place to check the capacity and mentality of parents before being allowed to give birth to a child, I'm not a parent yet but I look forward to seeing a society where we have lesser rate of child endangerment and availablity of child care services but before then let's all take good care of our children because without them the society has no tomorrow.

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_{This write-up was inspired by Ladies of hive community contest #186 in collaboration with #Dreemport.}

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_{Cover image - 𝖣𝖾𝗌𝗂𝗀𝗇𝖾𝖽 𝗎𝗌𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖼𝖺𝗇𝗏𝖺}

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