Never be Cornered by Weakness

I wasn't seeking to actively exit my former role as at the time I applied for my current job, It was more out of curiosity as a friend had recommended the role to me and I applied out of sheer curiosity - I wanted to see if I'd be selected or not. The selection process took several months and it was only when the offer letter came that I started making serious considerations.

Joining the company was from a position of strength. There was no desperation and every step was a calculated move. Fast forward to present day and there is a bit of desperation on my part to leave the company. I am no longer making applications out of curiosity but an active and almost desperate desire to make an exit.

The difference is quite startling. While the latter does drive me to put in a lot more effort, the former was made with a certain confidence that I doubt could be replicated by a desperate attempt at departure. I also comfort myself with the knowledge that it could be far worse - I could lose my job and become so desperate that I'd be willing to accept just about anything.

While I would like to replicate the past scenario, I realize that am not in a position where I hold the bargaining chips anymore. That said, the realization that it is also my fault is quite apparent. There is a reason politicians cling so desperately to power and one must battle constantly to be in a position of strength. In the workplace that means constant upgrading and that has been lacking from me for the past year.