Losing Track of Time

I had a conversation with my elder sister over a joint agreement we had a while back on how to progress on some of our life goals. She casually reminded me in our conversation and it caused quite the surprise. Now I am less concerned about what was discussed because I can remember quite vividly, and a lot more concerned about when it was discussed.

I could have sworn the conversation was fairly recent, say 2023 or 2024. I even argued with my sister to this effect till she provided hard evidence I could not deny. She brought out her dairy and showed me the date. That was enough to convince me seeing how faithful she is to the craft. To my greatest surprise the conversation took place in 2020, I believe during the thick of COVID. It was a shock as well as an eye opener to one very important fact about time.

It certainly doesn't wait for anyone and isn't nearly as far away as we think. I have tried to harp my life around making five year plans but I've not really been able to follow through. Just not consistent enough. Maybe a part of me feels that the time is so far away and several complications could potentially occur before then. It is a rather stifling point of view that kills both motivation and follow through discipline.

Alas five years have gone bye, and am nowhere near what was envisioned. It is a rather painful realisation. Sure, one cannot also ignore the day to day challenges we face that can sometimes be overwhelming. I give myself credit when due. Yet a turnaround is needed. I need to become the person I envisioned in the next five years or at least be proud of myself for trying.

Perhaps I'll revisit this post in another five years to see if I finally turn things around.