EMOTIONAL DAMAGED // MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCED

Emotional damaged is a lasting pain that is mostly caused by bad experiences like abuse, toxic marriage or relationship, neglect, significant loss and trauma. And it can make someone that had experienced it to have trust issues due to past experiences, having low and self esteem. Someone that passthrough emotional damaged can be heal from it again, yes is very possible for the person to regain his or her emotional stability back again, but though it will takes time and a lot of support from people and things the person could find it interested.

Anyone that has experienced emotional damaged will have low confidence in themselves due to continuity of feelings of sadness and pained and anxiety over what happened in the past. Such People that lost their beloved mother, father, closest friends or any other people to them tend to become emotional damaged for a while. Because the death of the people they have loved and now lost will create or caused a damaged to their emotional attachment for the loss of their love ones. And those people who have undergo harassment , especially young ladies who have experienced being rape by rapists at their tender age will have emotional damaged. Children who have undergo negative treatment persistently as a result of bullying from parents, friends and colleagues will also have emotional damaged.

Sometime ago, a friend of mine who we met recently shared his past experiences with me, how he has been rejected by many ladies and how even got sack from the little job he has been managing. He told me the major reason why he faced rejection from ladies was because of his body odours. Like, every lady he once dated with, broke up with him because he has a serious body odour. He has done all he could to take this body odour away from him all efforts yield no good result. He bought perfumes he could afford, the moment the perfume he worn finished it's work the odour will smell again.

I told him jokingly to be carrying the perfumes in his bag or pocket so that everytime he will be spraying it in his body but it doesn't sound matured. How can a grown man being carrying perfume in his bag or pocket? It doesn't look good for real.

He said at times after spending time with the ladies and they slept over in his place. Walking up at night or in the morning with him in the bed will be a horrible experience. I felt his pained when I heard this, I could imagine waking up beside someone in the same bed that have serious body odour, the experience will be horrible and unbearable.

And because of his experienced, it makes him to have unresolved mental health issue, lack of social connection with other people and being excluded in most of the things other people does. While he was telling me these things he has passed through, I noticed an emotional unavailability within him and feeling of internalized shame.

What about a man I know who stay closed to my compound who was once married but decided to stay unmarried for over 7 years now. I knew he had a wife when I was in secondary school but when I got to college of health keffi and graduated over four years now he wasn't married or have a wife. I asked one of my Aunty what happened to the man's wife, the aunty said he divorced his wife after the man caught his wife sleeping with another man in a hotel room while he was away from home. Although people have been telling him about his wife attitude but he doesn't believed them. So, one day he decided to tell the wife he is traveling as often as he used to do but he didn't traveled.

He lied to her and stay around to watch the wife movement. That same day the woman went out to a hostel to meet with another man unknowingly her husband was following her at the back. She entered the hostel room with the other man and few minutes after, her husband walks in and knock at the door of the hotel room. She was the person who came out and open the door and saw her husband standing looking at her.

It was a horrible experience that made the man never to trust any woman in his life till date. This is an issue of trust betrayed by his wife that left the man lost trust on any woman and caused him grief in the heart. The man was deceived and manipulated by his wife all along. When I heard everything my aunty told me I thought within myself, is this why the man became emotional dumbness to find another lady attractive? Yes, that's the reason.

Anybody who have experienced emotional damaged will definitely have low self confidence and self esteem that will affect his physical, mental, psychological and even his physical wellbeing for a long time until he finds possible reasons and support from people before he or she could find the courage to love and trust again and be able to get over the damaged emotionally.